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Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.4

Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. v. 4
Having history subjects in school is considered to be more beneficial by some group of individuals. While others believe that students should possess good knowledge about science and technology than history, in my opinion, students should learn history to understand the past but teaching students about science and technology in today’s competitive world is inevitable as we are highly dependent on it. Study of history enables student’s understanding of the country’s past, which is very important. Firstly, Students will know about culture and traditions followed by their ancestors. In this way, they will implement the same rituals and values and then pass that to the next generation. Secondly, the story about our martyrs and leaders inspires today’s generation to become patriotic. For instance, the story of the warrior late king Prithvi Narayan Shah during the unification of Nepal, sacrifices by our national heroes to protect the country is commendable and motivating. However, Science and technology are taking our world to another level. We are highly influenced by invention and technology. Acquiring a good knowledge of is necessary as we are entirely dependent upon them. For example, for performing household works like cleaning by vacuum cleaner, washing clothes in the washing machine to office work, we rely entirely on technology. Similarly, to withstand in this competitive world, students should learn about science. Scientists are discovering a fantastic invention day by day. To exemplify, consider the first human-robot Sophia, which performs all human task efficiently. Students can contribute new invention in future if they are taught science in schools. To conclude, a good understanding of history is essential for students, while knowledge of science and technology is compulsory too. In my opinion, Students should be taught history at school, but more priority should be given to science and technology.
Having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
subjects in school
is considered
to be more beneficial by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
group of individuals. While others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should possess
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, in my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
to understand the past
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s competitive world is inevitable as we are
highly
dependent on it.

Study of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
enables
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
understanding of the country’s past, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
will know about culture and traditions followed by their ancestors. In this way, they will implement the same rituals and values and then pass that to the
next
generation.
Secondly
, the story about our martyrs and leaders inspires
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s generation to become patriotic.
For instance
, the story of the warrior late king
Possible spelling mistake found.
Prithvi
Possible spelling mistake found.
Narayan
Shah during the unification of Nepal, sacrifices by our national heroes to protect the country is commendable and motivating.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
are taking our world to another level. We are
highly
influenced by invention and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. Acquiring a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
knowledge of is necessary as we are
entirely
dependent upon them.
For example
, for performing household works like cleaning by vacuum cleaner, washing clothes in the washing machine to office work, we rely
entirely
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
Similarly
, to withstand in this competitive world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should learn about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
. Scientists are discovering a fantastic invention day by day. To exemplify, consider the
first
human-robot Sophia, which performs all human task
efficiently
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
can contribute new invention in future if they
are taught
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
in schools.

To conclude
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
understanding of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, while knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is compulsory too. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
should
be taught
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
at school,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
more priority should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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