Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. with this opinion?

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. with this opinion?

essayopinionMusicCultural ExchangeSocial Cohesion

Writing Structure

Introduction

Thesis Statement

Supporting Sentence

Body Paragraph 1

Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Unclassified Sentences

Body Paragraph 2

Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Example Sentence

Body Paragraph 3

Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Result Sentence

Conclusion

Restatement of Thesis

Overall Band Score: 5.5

Task Achievement

5.5

The essay addresses the task but does not fully develop the argument. Some points are underexplained, and the conclusion is weak.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and repetitive. There are instances of incorrect word forms and collocations.

Coherence & Cohesion

5.5

The essay presents a clear argument but lacks logical flow and organization. Some ideas are not well connected, leading to confusion.

Grammatical Range

There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement and incorrect tense usage. The sentence structures are mostly simple.

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. with this opinion?