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Happiness is considered very important in life, why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness. Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your own knowledge and experiences. v.1

Happiness is considered very important in life, why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness. v. 1
It is widely believed that a state of happiness is a crucial one in life. However, it has been a difficult task to ascribe a particular meaning to describe it. In this essay I will be discussing the reason for this and factors necessary to be put in place to attain a state of happiness with relevant illustrations. Generally, happiness is a state of emotional excitement as a result of self actualization and satisfaction of a particular need per time. There are several reasons why it is difficult to define this in specificity. To start with, the meaning of happiness varies per person. Hence, it is individualized. This is because we all have a different need and whatever brings satisfaction and fulfilment to a person defines his own happiness. For example, at a point, passing my final year exam was all I needed to be happy, meanwhile my friend needed to have a successful marriage to be happy. Achieving this needs defined our individual happiness at that point. In addition, happiness is time defined because needs changes per time. sometimes an individual's need might be a house, when achieved it can change to money. Therefore achievement of the timely needs is what brings happiness because that is relevant to the moment. Looking into factors needed to be established to be happy in life, the first thing is goal setting. An individual must be able to define the need of the hour that will bring him desired joy. This will assist in making relevant plans. To illustrate, I discovered even though I have a lot of abilities, I can only derive joy in being a Nurse. I then made plans, asked questions and worked with people in the field. Goal setting helped me to concentrate my energy on this and I achieved it. The second factor which is determination means working against all odds. This particular factor will be the drive in times of challenges. In conclusion, happiness is difficult to define because it is time defined and individualised. Also goal setting and determination are two key factors to be happy in life.
It is
widely
believed that a state of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is a crucial one in life.
However
, it has been a difficult task to ascribe a particular meaning to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
it. In this essay I will be discussing the reason for this and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
necessary to
be put
in place to attain a state of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
with relevant illustrations.

Generally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is a state of emotional excitement
as a result
of self actualization and satisfaction of a particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. There are several reasons why it is difficult to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
define
this in specificity. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, the meaning of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
varies per person.
Hence
, it
is individualized
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we all have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
and whatever brings satisfaction and
Possible spelling mistake. 'fulfilment' is British English.
fulfilment
to a person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
defines
his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
.
For example
, at a point, passing my final year exam was all I needed to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
, meanwhile my friend needed to have a successful marriage to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
. Achieving this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
defined our individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
at that point.

In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
defined
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
sometimes
an individual's
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need
might be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, when achieved it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
to money.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
achievement of the timely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
is what brings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that is
relevant to the moment.

Looking into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
needed to
be established
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
in life, the
first
thing is goal setting. An individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
define
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
of the hour that will bring him desired joy. This will assist in making relevant plans. To illustrate, I discovered
even though
I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
abilities, I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
derive joy in being a Nurse. I then made plans, asked questions and worked with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the field. Goal setting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
me to concentrate my energy on this and I achieved it. The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
which is determination means working against all odds. This particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
will be the drive in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
of challenges.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is difficult to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
define
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
defined and
Do not mix variants of the same word ('individualise' and 'individualize') within a single text.
individualised
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
goal setting and determination are two key
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
in life.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay Happiness is considered very important in life, why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
352 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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