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Some people believe teenagers should focus on all subjects equally, whereas other people think that they should concentrate on only those subjects that they find interesting. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people believe teenagers should focus on all subjects equally, whereas other people think that they should concentrate on only those subjects that they find interesting. Discuss both views and give your opinion

essaydiscussionEducationTeenagers
Writing Structure
Introduction
Background Information

Thesis Statement

Body Paragraph 1
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Body Paragraph 2
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Conclusion
Restatement of Thesis

Overall Band Score: 6.5
Task Achievement
6.5
The essay addresses both views and provides a personal opinion. However, the development of ideas could be more thorough, and some points lack supporting evidence.
Lexical Resource
6
The vocabulary used is adequate but lacks variety and sophistication. Some phrases are repetitive, and there are instances of awkward word choices.
Coherence & Cohesion
6.5
The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both views, and a conclusion. However, some ideas could be better linked, and transitions between points could be smoother.
Grammatical Range
6
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of grammatical structures, but there are errors in sentence construction and punctuation that affect clarity.

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