Task Achievement
The essay addresses both views and provides a personal opinion. However, the development of ideas could be more thorough, and some points lack supporting evidence.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is adequate but lacks variety and sophistication. Some phrases are repetitive, and there are instances of awkward word choices.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both views, and a conclusion. However, some ideas could be better linked, and transitions between points could be smoother.
Grammatical Range
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of grammatical structures, but there are errors in sentence construction and punctuation that affect clarity.