Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task effectively, discussing serious problems and suggesting solutions. However, more specific examples could strengthen the argument.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is appropriate and varied, but there are instances of repetition and some inaccuracies in word choice.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Ideas are logically sequenced, but some transitions could be smoother.
Grammatical Range
The essay demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures, but there are some errors in punctuation and sentence complexity.