Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What are your opinions on this?

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What are your opinions on this?

essaydiscussionChild LaborWork Experience
Writing Structure
The issue of children being engaged in paid work is a subject of debate, with strong arguments on both sides. Some people see it as entirely wrong, believing that childhood should be a time for education and personal growth, free from the pressures of earning money. They argue that work at a young age can interfere with a child’s education, mental health, and overall development. For instance, children who work long hours may find it hard to focus on their studies, and as a result, fall behind in school. Furthermore, there are concerns about exploitation and the possibility that these children may be exposed to hazardous working conditions. Those in this camp emphasize the need to protect children from such risks and to allow them to enjoy their youth. On the other hand, others believe that paid work can provide valuable life skills and a sense of responsibility. They argue that learning to manage money, understanding the value of hard work, and gaining real-world experience are essential lessons that formal education may not fully offer. Supporters of this view contend that, when balanced with school and other activities, paid work can foster independence and prepare children for adulthood. Additionally, work can give children insight into career possibilities and help them build confidence in their abilities. In my opinion, there should be a balance. While it’s important to ensure that children are not overworked or deprived of their education, limited and regulated work experience could be beneficial. It can teach valuable lessons about responsibility, time management, and the real-world consequences of actions. However, this must be carefully monitored to ensure it doesn’t negatively impact their overall development.
Introduction
Background Information

Thesis Statement

Body Paragraph 1
Supporting Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Body Paragraph 2
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Conclusion
Restatement of Thesis

Summary of Main Points

Overall Band Score: 7.5
Task Achievement
8
The essay effectively addresses the prompt, presenting a balanced view on the issue. It develops ideas clearly and supports them with relevant examples. However, a stronger conclusion could reinforce the main argument.
Lexical Resource
7
The vocabulary used is appropriate and varied, with some instances of higher-level words. However, there are moments of repetition that could be avoided.
Coherence & Cohesion
7.5
The essay presents a clear structure with a logical flow of ideas. Each paragraph addresses a specific aspect of the topic, contributing to the overall argument. However, some transitions between ideas could be smoother.
Grammatical Range
7
The essay demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures, including complex sentences. However, there are minor errors in punctuation and sentence structure that could be improved.

Additional Details
Full Report
Show CEFR Map
Writing Ideas
Vocabulary
Writing Structure
Users Examples
Users Comments
Check Your Writing
Other Writings