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Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.10

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. v. 10
Introduction: In the recent years, various opinions about raising kids are emerging at a high rate, nonetheless, these two ideas are the most significant ones. It is said that a society full of selfish people will be created if we let children to make personal choices about aspects of daily life, whereas some people believe that it is fundamental that the kids have the allowance to decide on those aspects. This essay will discuss both views. Primarily, children being permitted to choose what they like in everyday matters will only think about themselves as they grow up. Explaining for this, when we let children do what they like freely, as an instinct, they will only think of the consequences happening to themselves. Since this mindset is developed at a very young age, it will be easily developed during the growing process of the youngsters and will be very hard to change. This essay agrees with the view due to the significance of the results. For example, a science study claimed that most toddlers become more selfish after a long period of time being given the permission to make their own decisions in eating, drinking and other daily activities. By contrast, it is also essential for the youngsters to act as their preference. To be specific, freedom in decision making in life will help them to develop greater confidence as well as independence because no reliance on other people was caused if we let the toddlers act this way. As great as the idea may seem, it cannot be agreed with this perception as the children still need a foundation of listening and obeying skill before growing up. For instance, researches show that a sense of confidence and independent can still be improved in older kids. Conclusion: In summary, while acting as preference is important in a great way for a child to grow up becoming an independent person, adverse ramifications might happen if parents are not careful. Therefore, it is suggested that parents should really understand their sons or daughters before deciding of which method of raising fit them best.
Introduction: In the recent years, various opinions about raising kids are emerging at a high rate, nonetheless, these two
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
are the most significant ones. It
is said
that a society full of selfish
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will
be created
if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
personal choices about aspects of daily life, whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that it is fundamental that the kids have the allowance to decide on those aspects. This essay will discuss both views.

Primarily
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
being permitted
to choose what they like in everyday matters will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about themselves as they grow up. Explaining for this, when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
do what they like
freely
, as an instinct, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of the consequences happening to themselves. Since this mindset
is developed
at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young age, it will be
easily
developed during the growing process of the youngsters and will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with the view due to the significance of the results.
For example
, a science study claimed that most toddlers become more selfish after a long period of time being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the permission to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
decisions in eating, drinking and other daily activities.

By contrast, it is
also
essential for the youngsters to act as their preference. To be specific, freedom in
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
decision making
in life will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to develop greater confidence
as well
as independence
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
no reliance on other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
was caused
if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the toddlers act this way. As great as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
may seem, it cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
with this perception as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
still
need a foundation of listening and obeying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
growing up.
For instance
, researches
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that a sense of confidence and independent can
still
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
in older kids.

Conclusion: In summary, while acting as preference is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
Consider replacing "in a great way" with the adverb for "great"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a great way
for a child to grow up becoming an independent person, adverse ramifications might happen if parents are not careful.
Therefore
, it
is suggested
that parents should
really
understand their sons or daughters
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
deciding of which method of raising fit them best.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
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IELTS essay Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
350 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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