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Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behavior. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences v.4

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behavior. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences v. 4
With the advancement in transportation technology, the tourism industry is now a prominent source of revenue for most countries. With millions of people crossing the borders to visit other parts of the world, the social norms that the visitors should conform to in the country of destination is subject for debate. While some people believe that visitors should observe the local customs, I believe the host country should be tolerant of the cultural differences. On the other hand, some believe that visitors should feel responsible to adapt themselves to the rules and the customs of the country that they are visiting. From their point of view, since many norms and customs have a religious root, overlooking them might lead to conflict. For example, visitors to Islamic countries should be fully aware of the fact that they should refrain from eating and drinking in public areas in Ramadan. Tourists and expatriates who are oblivious to the mentioned rule might offend the local people or even end up in prison. On the other hand, there are those who subscribe to the view that tourists should not be compelled to follow the customs of the destination country. They argue the host country should be willing to embrace cultural differences wholeheartedly. From a cultural perspective, learning the customs and rules of the destination country may be time consuming and require too much effort. Therefore, many tourists may find it a tedious and futile task. In my personal experience, once local are exposed to the cultural differences as exhibited by the visitors, differences in behavior for instance, they gain valuable knowledge of cultures around the world. In this way, locals can also gain insight into the lifestyle and cuisine of the visitors, which can help them cater for their needs more suitably. In conclusion, there are advantages to conforming to the local customs when visiting a foreign country. However, I believe, the host country should welcome the differences and create an atmosphere of comfort for the tourists and lift the burden from the visitors' shoulders.
With the advancement in transportation technology, the tourism industry is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
a prominent source of revenue for most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. With millions of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
crossing the borders to visit other parts of the world, the social norms that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
should conform to in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
of destination is subject for debate. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
should observe the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
customs, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should be tolerant of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
differences.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
should feel responsible to adapt themselves to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and the customs of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
that they are visiting. From their point of view, since
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
norms and customs have a religious root, overlooking them might lead to conflict.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
to Islamic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should be
fully
aware of the fact that they should refrain from eating and drinking in public areas in Ramadan.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourists
and expatriates who are oblivious to the mentioned
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
might offend the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
or even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up in prison.

On the other hand
, there are those who subscribe to the view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
should not
be compelled
to follow the customs of the destination
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. They argue the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should be willing to embrace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
differences
wholeheartedly
. From a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
perspective, learning the customs and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
of the destination
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
may be
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
and require too much effort.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
may find it a tedious and futile task.

In my personal experience, once
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
are exposed
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
differences
as exhibited by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
differences
in behavior
for instance
, they gain valuable knowledge of cultures around the world. In this way,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals
can
also
gain insight into the lifestyle and cuisine of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them cater for their needs more
suitably
.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
conclusion, there are advantages to conforming to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
customs when visiting a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
However
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
, the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should welcome the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
differences
and create an atmosphere of comfort for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
and lift the burden from the
Possible spelling mistake found.
visitors&
#039; shoulders.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
38Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
With languages, you are at home anywhere.
Edward De Waal

IELTS letter Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behavior. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences v. 4

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
340 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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