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Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Other say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both view and your opinion. v.10

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Other say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. v. 10
The most heated argument these days regarding human well-being is that, one school of thought proposed the idea which states the effective method to ensure good well-being among people is to indulge them in sports activities, whereas the other school denies this view. According to them, this is not exactly what is needed moreover, there must be other ways to assure people's fitness. In this essay, I am going to ponder both the perspectives and will provide my opinion as well. well-being care is of most significance in regard to human beings. In current times, many people talk about fitness care and well-being facilities as their fundamental right, therefore, they stress upon the importance of sport centres and other playing facilities to benefit well-being to the fullest. People believe that it is necessary to be indulged more into physical activities to ensure excellent fitness. For instance, from the past few years, we are witnessing an increase in public demand to establish sports centres, stadiums and gyms for public, concerning their fitness. Now we commence with the second perspective which states that sports in not the only solution to cater this, however it is of great significance, but there are many other effective methods, which shouldn't be neglected. A good illustration for this is that, people are least bothered about bad eating and do not see it as deteriorating habit for health as 60% of our population prefer eating outside rather than cooking at healthy meal at home. People must monitor their bad eating habits in order to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Secondly, our generation is lacking good sleeping patterns as well. People prefer to work all day and then they spend night in other activities rather than giving the rest to their mind and body. This is dangerous for human fitness. In conclusion, we looked into both sides of the matter which enables us to comprehend that some people are of the view that sports in of significance where as other oppose this point and proposed other ways to ensure healthy living. In my opinion, I strongly agree that sports activities are good for human well-being but, this is not the only solution, we need to overall improve our life style to assure good physical and mental well-being such as, healthy eating and sleeping habits.
The most heated argument these days regarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well-being
is that, one school of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
proposed the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
which states the effective method to ensure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well-being
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
to indulge them in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
, whereas the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
school denies this view. According to them, this is not exactly what
is needed
moreover
, there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
ways to assure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's fitness. In this essay, I am going to ponder both the perspectives and will provide my opinion
as well
.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
well-being
care is of most significance in regard to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings. In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
times,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
talk about fitness care and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well-being
facilities as their fundamental right,
therefore
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
upon the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
playing facilities to benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well-being
to the fullest.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
believe that it is necessary to
be indulged
more into physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
to ensure excellent fitness.
For instance
, from the past few years, we are witnessing an increase in public demand to establish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
, stadiums and gyms for public, concerning their fitness.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
we commence with the second perspective which states that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
solution to cater this,
however
it is of great significance,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
effective methods, which shouldn't
be neglected
. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
illustration for this is that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are least bothered about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
and do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
it as deteriorating habit for health as 60% of our population prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
outside
rather
than cooking at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
meal at home.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
monitor their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
habits in order to maintain a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
lifestyle.
Secondly
, our generation is lacking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
sleeping patterns
as well
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
prefer to work all
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
day and
then they spend night in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
rather
than giving the rest to their mind and body. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
fitness.

In conclusion
, we looked into both sides of the matter which enables us to comprehend that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are of the view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in of significance
Did you mean "whereas"?
where as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
oppose this point and proposed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
ways to ensure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
living. In my opinion, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well-being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, this is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
solution, we need to
overall
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our life style to assure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
physical and mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well-being
such as,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
and sleeping habits.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Other say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
385 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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