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Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to do more school work. How do you think children should spend their free time? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that children are give too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to do more school work. How do you think children should spend their free time? v. 2
Leisure time, without any qualms, is the best time to gain extra knowledge and peace for mind. In this modern era, people believe that children have more free time that they should spend in doing their homework. Personally, I corporate that children should indulge themselves in extra curricular activities in their free time. Let us discuss some compelling reasons which will lead to words or reasonable inference. playing outdoor is the most important activity a child should do for the better physical and mental health. To illustrate, a child who play is more healthy than a bookworm child. A sporty child can do his work more efficiently. Outdoor play also enables children to enjoy the natural environment. And as Lord Nuffield once said, the best preparation for adulthood is to have a full and enjoyable childhood. Thus childhood must include outdoor play. Moreover, art and craft is also one of the necessary activity for a child. As, it teaches children to reuse the things which they feel useless. They learn to make new things that can be useful for domestic purpose or their personal use. For example, a child who is efficient in art and craft can prepare the charts, assignment on models themselves. So, a child should spend their free time in such activities which can teach them something more than school work. Conjunctive to it, spending leisure time with grandparents is the best way to learn moral values. Grandparents are a valuable resource because they have so many stories and experiences from their own lives to share. Adjointly, reading is also one of the activity which leads a child towards better mentality. A child who read books can think more efficiently. Reading books teach your child better concentration and patience. Also children should learn basic cooking to survive in certain situations. They should gain knowledge about using gas stove etcetera which can help them to have one time meal without their parents. To sequitur, after having a myopic outlook it can be reduced that children should not spend their free time doing the school work because it will make them bookworm. Children should spend their leisure time in learning new things which can be more helpful for them rather than being a bookworm. Basic cooking, reading, playing and more importantly grandparents are the best way to spend free time for the children.
Leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, without any qualms, is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to gain extra knowledge and peace for mind. In this modern era,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
that they should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
in doing their homework.
Personally
, I corporate that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should indulge themselves in
This word is normally spelled as one.
extra curricular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
compelling reasons which will lead to words or reasonable inference.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
playing
outdoor is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
should do for the better physical and mental health. To illustrate, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
who play is more healthy than a bookworm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
. A sporty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
can do his work more
efficiently
. Outdoor play
also
enables
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to enjoy the natural environment. And as Lord
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nuffield
once said, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
preparation for adulthood is to have a full and enjoyable childhood.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
childhood
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
include outdoor play.

Moreover
, art and craft is
also
one of the necessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
, it teaches
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to reuse the things which they feel useless. They learn to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
new things that can be useful for domestic purpose or their personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
For example
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
who is efficient in art and craft can prepare the charts, assignment on models themselves.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
which can teach them something more than school work.

Conjunctive to it, spending leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with grandparents is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
way to learn moral values. Grandparents are a valuable resource
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
stories and experiences from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
to share.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Adjointly
, reading is
also
one of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
which leads a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
towards better mentality. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
who read books can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
more
efficiently
. Reading books teach your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
better concentration and patience.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should learn basic cooking to survive in certain situations. They should gain knowledge about using gas stove etcetera which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to have one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
meal without their parents.

To sequitur, after having a myopic outlook it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
doing the school work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them bookworm.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in learning new things which can be more helpful for them
rather
than being a bookworm. Basic cooking, reading, playing and more
importantly
grandparents are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
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The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to do more school work. How do you think children should spend their free time?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
394 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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