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Research indicates that the characteristics we born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experience we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence? Give reasons for your answer and include any v.1

Research indicates that the characteristics we born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experience we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence? 1
It is often suggested by many people to keep the infrastructure of the houses as simple as it use to be a couple of decades ago. Whereas, some believe that everyone should have a choice to choose a contemporary design for their houses. This essay will juxtapose both these views, and finally end with my opinion. The beauty of an area can be retained if there is a symmetry among the buildings. Hence, to maintain the aesthetic beauty of a locality, it is mandatory that all new build houses and building blocks should follow the architecture of the older building. Additionally, this can also minimise the issues between the neighbours occurring due to construction. For instance, we can witness many fights in a locality because of construction of an unapproved structure of a house these days, creating an extra floor for instance, which might not be approved by the local society. These issues can be avoided if everyone follows the same housing patterns. On the flip side, each family has a different requirement with respect to accomodation. For instance, a two bedroom set would be sufficient for a nucleated family, but it would not be a choice of a joint family. Therefore, giving the freedom to customise the house would be helpful to cater the needs of different kinds of families. Secondly, new architectures and constructions gives a platform to various emerging architects to showcase the talent and construct trendy and contemporary infrastructures. In conclusion, some people this that all houses should be built with the conventional architecture to maintain the symmetry of the area and to avoid any kind of dispute due to construction. However, I feel that everyone should be given opportunity to apply their choice of architecture as it can easily cater to various requirement of different families and give to architects to show their innovation.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
suggested by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the infrastructure of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
as simple as it
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
be a couple of decades ago. Whereas,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that everyone should have a choice to choose a contemporary design for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
. This essay will juxtapose both these views, and
finally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
with my opinion.

The beauty of an area can
be retained
if there is a symmetry among the buildings.
Hence
, to maintain the aesthetic beauty of a locality, it is mandatory that all new build
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
and building blocks should follow the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
architecture
of the older building.
Additionally
, this can
also
Possible spelling mistake. 'minimise' is British English.
minimise
the issues between the
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
occurring due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
.
For instance
, we can witness
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
fights in a locality
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
of an unapproved structure of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
these days, creating an extra floor
for instance
, which might not
be approved
by the local society. These issues can
be avoided
if everyone follows the same housing patterns.

On the flip side, each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
requirement with respect to
Possible spelling mistake found.
accomodation
.

For instance
, a two bedroom set would be sufficient for a nucleated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it would not be a choice of a joint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
Therefore
, giving the freedom to
Possible spelling mistake. 'customise' is British English.
customise
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
would be helpful to cater the needs of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
.
Secondly
, new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
architectures
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
constructions
gives a platform to various emerging architects to showcase the talent and construct trendy and contemporary infrastructures.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
this that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
should
be built
with the conventional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
architecture
to maintain the symmetry of the area and to avoid any kind of dispute due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
.
However
, I feel that everyone should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
opportunity to apply their choice of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
architecture
as it can
easily
cater to various requirement of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
and give to architects to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their innovation.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
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IELTS essay Research indicates that the characteristics we born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experience we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence? 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
309 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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