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Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed? v.11

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed? v. 11
Recently, becoming an entrepreneur as self-employed has been a trend for many mankind worldwide, compared with working for an institution whether it is a private company or not. In my own perspectives, this circumstance has occurred due to unpleasant or uncomfortable surroundings in the office, whereas there are some drawbacks for those who attempt to build own occupation. Having a supportive colleague and bosses is one of all workers volition. Many people misunderstand towards employees who resign at their first job. In most cases, fresh graduates are astonishing in their first experience because of their objection to people around is far from their expectations, that means they actually capable with their duties but cannot accept the sort of any person’s characteristics. The unhealthy rivalry has been one of their resent conditions, according to a questionnaire which examined for graduates from prestigious universities. Based on that survey, many of them eventually take the opportunity to be self-employed and earn much salaries by selling or creating something. However, there are the detrimental effects on self-employing, such as getting a loss and having unstable earnings. Entrepreneurs tend to obtain the fluctuate profits and sometimes should ready to take some risks, notably incur much losses. Sooner or later, this lead to zero income a month. To conclude, the majority of job seekers ultimately decide to be self-employed rather than being one of an employee in a company or organisation owing to their reluctance to cooperate with random people whom an irritating type to them. Nonetheless, working with themselves also prompt many consequences, e. g. No earnings.
Recently, becoming an entrepreneur as self-employed has been a trend for
many mankind
worldwide, compared with working for an institution whether it is a private
company
or not. In my
own
perspectives, this circumstance has occurred due to unpleasant or uncomfortable surroundings in the office, whereas there are
some
drawbacks for those who attempt to build
own
occupation.

Having a supportive colleague and bosses is one of all
workers
volition.
Many
people
misunderstand towards employees who resign at their
first
job.
In most cases
, fresh graduates are astonishing in their
first
experience
because
of their objection to
people
around is far from their expectations, that means they actually capable with their duties
but
cannot accept the sort of any person’s characteristics. The unhealthy rivalry has been one of their resent conditions, according to a questionnaire which examined for graduates from prestigious universities. Based on that survey,
many
of them
eventually
take the opportunity to be self-employed and earn
much
salaries by selling or creating something.

However
, there are the detrimental effects on self-employing, such as getting a loss and having unstable earnings. Entrepreneurs tend to obtain
the fluctuate
profits and
sometimes
should ready to take
some
risks
,
notably
incur
much
losses. Sooner or later, this lead to zero income a month.

To conclude
, the majority of job seekers
ultimately
decide to be self-employed
rather
than being one of an employee in a
company
or
organisation
owing to their reluctance to cooperate with random
people
whom an irritating type to them. Nonetheless, working with themselves
also
prompt
many
consequences,
e. g.
No earnings.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed? v. 11

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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