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In many countries school have severe problems with student behavior. What do you think are the cause of this? What solution can you suggest? v.2

In many countries school have severe problems with student behavior. What do you think are the cause of this? What solution can you suggest? v. 2
Teachers deal with student misbehavior on a daily basis. There are plenty of researches done by researchers to find out the best way to treat these students, but there is no certainty on these solutions or 100 % successes. Recent studies reveal that the solution depends on some factors which were the causes of student misbehavior. Family condition is the most important factor which have strong impact on student. Students who have alcoholic parent are more likely to cause problem in the schools, since they are freer in the school than home, they show their anger and discord by many ways. For instance, yesterday, Ted talk showed the woman who was manager of school in the Us. She had a student who make school unsafe for other students and their actions have not change the students. They call his parent, punished him, but none of these works have reformed him. Finally, she decided to find the cause of these behaving which was parent rivalry. With that in mind, she decided to make him senior of junior students and surprisingly, it works out. There are other factors such as mental problems, not being assertive and etc. There is, however, no doubt that there is not final solution for student’s misbehavior. There are some approved treatment for some students. First of all, I strongly believe teachers must love student as their children which help student to confront his problem and reform it better. Also, it should be noted that for the rude students, love is not enough and they need punishment. For clown students, speaking with him out of class is useful. To wrap it up, by updating technologies, problem are going to be more complicated, but for misbehaving students, patient and love are the best meanings for teachers and school staff.
Teachers deal with
student
misbehavior on a daily basis. There are
plenty
of researches done by researchers to find out the best way to treat these
students
,
but
there is no certainty on these solutions or 100 % successes. Recent studies reveal that the solution depends on
some
factors which were the causes of
student
misbehavior.

Family condition is the most
important
factor which have strong impact on
student
.
Students
who have alcoholic parent are more likely to cause
problem
in the
schools
, since they are freer in the
school
than home, they
show
their anger and discord by
many
ways.
For instance
, yesterday, Ted talk
showed
the woman who was manager of
school
in
the Us
. She had a
student
who
make
school
unsafe for other
students
and their actions have not
change
the
students
. They call his parent, punished him,
but
none of these works have reformed him.
Finally
, she decided to find the cause of these behaving which was parent rivalry. With that in mind, she decided to
make
him senior of junior
students
and
surprisingly
, it works out.

There are other factors such as mental
problems
, not being assertive
and etc
. There is,
however
, no doubt that there is not final solution for
student’s
misbehavior.
There
are
some
approved treatment for
some
students
.
First of all
, I
strongly
believe teachers
must
love
student
as their children which
help
student
to confront his
problem
and reform it better.
Also
, it should
be noted
that for the rude
students
,
love
is not
enough and
they need punishment. For clown
students
, speaking with him out of
class
is useful.

To wrap it up, by updating technologies,
problem
are going to be more complicated,
but
for misbehaving
students
, patient and
love
are the best meanings for teachers and
school
staff.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay In many countries school have severe problems with student behavior. What do you think are the cause of this? What solution can you suggest? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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