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Some people say that the main environmental problem of our times is the loss particular species of plants and animals. Other say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience v.1

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our times is the loss particular species of plants and animals. Other say that there are more important environmental problems. 1
Many individuals have an opinion that the loss of flora and fauna is the main problem of our environment while some people say that there are others more important. There are valid reasons of both, which  I will consider now. On the one hand, people who propose that the extinction of plants and animals is the essential environment problem for two main reasons. Firstly, there are a few floras and faunas that take an important part for environment. For instance, some plants such as trees and flowers make the air fresher while some animals such as a worm are good for the soil. Secondly, if some animals and plants are disappearing, others might extinct too. This is because many species are the food to others  and many species need the others to live. For example, grass or green leaf for herbivore animals and the insects help the flowers to reproduce. On the other hand, The other problems must become the main attention for environment, not just animals and plants.   Firstly, there is global warming issue which affects the world and have an impact on environment. Some problem such as climate change make government in many nations spend billions of dollars to handle each year. Secondly, human are also must take responsibility for environment in recent years. People release a ton of toxic emission to the environment. It also makes the In conclusion, although the extinction of floras and faunas is essential, other problems are more important. If the governments and society have a significant action regarding global warming and human behaviour, environmental problem would be solved.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
individuals have an opinion that the loss of flora and fauna is the main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that there are others more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. There are valid reasons of both, which
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
I will consider
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who propose that the extinction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is the essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
for two main reasons.
Firstly
, there are a few floras and faunas that take an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
such as trees and flowers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the air fresher while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
such as a worm are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the soil.
Secondly
, if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
are disappearing, others might extinct too. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
species are the food to others
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
species need the others to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
For example
, grass or green leaf for herbivore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and the insects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the flowers to reproduce.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
become the main attention for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
, not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Firstly
, there is global warming issue which affects the world and have an impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
such as climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations spend billions of dollars to handle each year.
Secondly
, human are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take responsibility for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
in recent years.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
release a ton of toxic emission to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. It
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
the


In conclusion
, although the extinction of floras and faunas is essential,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. If the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and society have a significant action regarding global warming and human
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
, environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
would
be solved
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that the main environmental problem of our times is the loss particular species of plants and animals. Other say that there are more important environmental problems. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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