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Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these view and give your own opinions. v.2

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. v. 2
There are many opinions that the risk for endangered plants and animal are the severe consequences of worsening environment while others argue that other problem is more dangerous. In my point of view, despite the impact of natural disasters, the loss of wildlife is the most serious problem in the environment. Nowadays, due to the climate change, there are more and more natural disasters that occur all over the world. Many scientists show the reason of increasing in the frequency and potency of hurricanes, tsunamis and blizzards is that the increment rises in temperature. There are countless instances of these from the last two decades, but the tsunami affecting mainly Thailand, Indonesia and Malaysia in 2004 is a particular example. This was a largest natural disaster in this century and resulted in thousands of deaths, injuries and billions of dollars in damages, which leads many people lost their homes, lives and livelihoods. The main reason that many people, mainly focus on plant and animal life because of the rising of endangered species in recent decades. The polar bear is a well-known example of this problem. Polar bears live mainly in the Arctic and the melting of the iceberg has resulted in reduced ice for polar bear to live on. The polar bear has become an endangered species and it is forecast that by 2100 they will be extinct in the wild. Their extinction will likely have a domino effect on the ecosystem in the Arctic and other endangered species such as whales. This is just only one example of the impact of global warming on animals and plants in our plants. Extinction is irreversible and there is a negative impact on the ecosystem due to the climate change in over the world. All in all, the loss of specific species, mainly effects to the ecosystem, which could cause many serious consequences in a natural environment. In order to avoid this problem, the government should give some rights to protect the endangered species, but also takes serious steps to prevent fossil fuel and carbon dioxide emitting into the environment that is the main reason of climate change.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
opinions that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and animal are the severe consequences of worsening environment while others argue that other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
. In my point of view, despite the impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
disasters, the loss of wildlife is the most serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in the environment.

Nowadays, due to the climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, there are more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
disasters that occur all over the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
scientists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the reason of increasing in the frequency and potency of hurricanes, tsunamis and blizzards is that the increment rises in temperature. There are countless instances of these from the last two decades,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the tsunami affecting
mainly
Thailand, Indonesia and Malaysia in 2004 is a particular example. This was
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
largest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
disaster in this century and resulted in thousands of deaths, injuries and billions of dollars in damages, which leads
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
lost their homes,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and livelihoods.

The main reason that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
mainly
focus on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plant
and animal life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the rising of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species in recent decades. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
polar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bear
is a well-known example of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Polar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bears
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
mainly
in the Arctic and the melting of the iceberg has resulted in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
ice for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
polar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bear
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
on. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
polar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bear
has become an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species and it is forecast that by 2100 they will be extinct in the wild. Their extinction will likely have a domino effect on the ecosystem in the Arctic and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species such as whales. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one example of the impact of global warming on animals and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
. Extinction is irreversible and there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the ecosystem due to the climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in over the world.

All in all, the loss of specific species,
mainly
effects to the ecosystem, which could cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
serious consequences in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
environment. In order to avoid this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
rights to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
takes serious steps to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
fossil fuel and carbon dioxide emitting into the environment
that is
the main reason of climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
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IELTS essay Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
356 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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