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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.7

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. v. 7
Many people find themselves in situations where they must either accept what life has given them or find a way to move up in the world. In my opinion, although accepting your situation in life may be pragmatic in some cases, it is still better to at least strive to improve your situation as it can usually be bettered to some degree. On the one hand, the vast majority of people are unable to drastically change their situation and acceptance of this fact will make them feel more satisfied with their lives. The best example of this would be those people living in dire economic conditions. Recent research puts the Democratic Republic of Congo as one of the poorest nations on Earth, both due to a lack of developed infrastructure and internal strife in recent years. For a person living in a small village, ravaged by war or famine, it would be cruel to suggest that they should find a way to improve their lives when it might simply be impossible. Instead, such people may feel they are better off accepting that they cannot make any changes to their situation at the present moment and just focus on their own survival and that of their family. These situations are rare but do exist around the world in various countries, particularly if they are at war or experiencing a severe economic downturn. On the other hand, few would dispute the fact that in even the most difficult situations people can make their lives better through continued effort. Instances of people who worked hard and became successful abound in both developed and developing nations. Some relevant examples of this are the postwar situations of countries like Germany, Japan, and South Korea. All those countries were devastated by war to greater and lesser degrees yet they are all currently economic powerhouses. In Japan, World War 2 left their population depleted of workers, a deep national debt due to reparations and infrastructure reduced to rubble. By not accepting their situation they were able to become leaders in technology through notable companies like Sony, Nokia and Toyota. The efficacy of the individuals who had to work hard to improve their lives is reflected in the overall progress of the country and should serve as an example to all war-torn nations. To conclude, there are very few situations where it would be advisable to simply accept an unhappy situation because hard work over a long period will pay off to some degree in the vast majority of cases. By having a more positive attitude it is also more likely that your efforts to make a better life will be rewarded, while a more defeatist attitude is likely to reduce your chances to make changes in life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
find themselves in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
where they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
either accept what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
them or find a way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
up in the world. In my opinion, although accepting your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
may be pragmatic in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases, it is
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to at least strive to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
as it can
usually
be bettered
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
degree.

On the one hand, the vast majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are unable to
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
and acceptance of this fact will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them feel more satisfied with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. The best example of this would be those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in dire economic conditions. Recent research puts the Democratic Republic of Congo as one of the poorest nations on Earth, both due to a lack of developed infrastructure and internal strife in recent years. For a person living in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
village, ravaged by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
war
or famine, it would be cruel to suggest that they should find a way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
when it might
simply
be impossible.
Instead
, such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may feel they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
off accepting that they cannot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
at the present moment and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
focus on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
survival and that of their family. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
are rare
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
do exist around the world in various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
,
particularly
if they are at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
war
or experiencing a severe economic downturn.

On the other hand
, few would dispute the fact that in even the most difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
through continued effort. Instances of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who worked
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
and became successful abound in both developed and developing nations.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
relevant examples of this are the postwar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like Germany, Japan, and South Korea. All those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
were devastated
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
war
to greater and lesser degrees
yet
they are all
currently
economic powerhouses. In Japan, World
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
War
2
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
their population depleted of workers, a deep national debt due to reparations and infrastructure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to rubble. By not accepting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
they were able to become leaders in technology through notable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
like Sony, Nokia and Toyota. The efficacy of the individuals who had to work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
is reflected
in the
overall
progress of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and should serve as an example to all war-torn nations.

To conclude
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
where it would be advisable to
simply
accept an unhappy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work over a long period will pay off to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
degree in the vast majority of cases. By having a more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
attitude it is
also
more likely that your efforts to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
will
be rewarded
, while a more defeatist attitude is likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
your chances to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
42Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
460 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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