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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion v.44

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. 44
In the cycle of life, people always face some bad things which are that people should confirm with the big heart with those conditions. However, others believe that there is much opportunity to tackle a bad situation to be a good condition. I think people should consider both of them to get a better life. To begin with, sometimes people should agree from their bad life such as unsatisfactory jobs and a low salary because it will maintain their positive thinking. At this time, people can survive and stay learning from their experiences. They can compare their life with other people which take more worst than it's life so that people will feel blessed to confirm the situation that bring them to be meaningful and valuable. On the other hand, life is changing when people can push their ambition to achieve the goal. By taking this perception, at this time, their life will be more active and productive due to the fact that people are occupied with full of motivation to improve their life and move-out from a bad situation. For instance, the story of Mr. Joko Widodo, the first person in Indonesia, took the journey of his life which was started at the bottom. He was born in a farmer family who are not rich. However, his life has much of motivation so that, currently, He can be the president of Indonesia which is the top position of his career. In conclusion, people should satisfy their condition although it is a hard condition. However, they can change their life as long as people have a big dream which is supported by keeping active, productive, and motivated.
In the cycle of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
always face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
things which are that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should confirm with the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
heart with those conditions.
However
, others believe that there is much opportunity to tackle a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
situation to be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
condition
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should consider both of them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a better life.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
such as unsatisfactory jobs and a low salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will maintain their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
thinking. At this time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can survive and stay learning from their experiences. They can compare their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
which take
Use only "worst" (without 'more') when you use the superlative.
more worst
than it's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will feel blessed to confirm the situation that bring them to be meaningful and valuable.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is changing when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can push their ambition to achieve the goal. By taking this perception, at this time, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
will be more active and productive due to the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are occupied
with full of motivation to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
-out from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
situation.
For instance
, the story of Mr.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Joko
Possible spelling mistake found.
Widodo
, the
first
person in Indonesia, took the journey of his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
which was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at the bottom. He
was born
in a farmer family who are not rich.
However
, his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
has much of motivation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that,
currently
, He can be the president of Indonesia which is the top position of his career.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should satisfy their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
condition
although it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
condition
.
However
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
Did you mean "lives"?
life
as long as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
dream which
is supported
by keeping active, productive, and motivated.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. 44

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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