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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.42

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. v. 42
The discussion about whether people should try to improve in all aspects of life or accept some parts of current situations will be discussed in this article. Is this accepted to stay satisfied with the current condition or we should criticise the weaknesses of the situation and try to improve. While acceptance might be the key to the satisfaction and avoid some mental pressure, no improvement and success will achieve without trying to improve. To understand and digest the current situations and accept everything as it is, may bring the gift of slight enjoyment, but it can develop mental depression in the same time. If a hypothetical person lives in a reasonable home with decent income from average job, there will not be considerable reasons to argue and complain about the situation. But living under the poverty line and adjusting to the condition with to effort to improvement is not a wise pathway at all! In other hand, to have an energetic personality and actively looking for improvements in all aspects of life can be challenging and rewarding at the same time. People in this category might progress forward all the time, but stress and anxiety can make the situations worsen every day. So not only no success will achieve, but also significant life problems can bring the darkness everywhere! To explain my own point of view I should say, moderation is the golden key to balance ourselves between two extreme points! We all agree that we should be thankful and enjoy what we have. Respect and protect what we achieved so far while there is always room to improve. To be short and conclusive, taking the appropriate strategy must be adjusted in regards to out habits, capabilities and abilities to create a better future for everyone without mental or physical harm to selves to others.
The discussion about whether
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
in all aspects of life or accept
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parts of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
will
be discussed
in this article. Is this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
to stay satisfied with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
condition or
we should
Possible spelling mistake. 'criticise' is British English.
criticise
the weaknesses of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
and try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
. While acceptance might be the key to the satisfaction and avoid
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
mental pressure, no improvement and success will achieve without trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
.

To understand and digest the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
and accept everything as it is, may bring the gift of slight enjoyment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it can develop mental depression in the same time. If a hypothetical person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in a reasonable home with decent income from average job, there will not be considerable reasons to argue and complain about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
living under the poverty line and adjusting to the condition with to effort to improvement is not a wise pathway at all!

In other hand, to have an energetic personality and
actively
looking for improvements in all aspects of life can be challenging and rewarding at the same time.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
in this category might progress forward all the time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and anxiety can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
worsen every day.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
no success will achieve,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
significant life problems can bring the darkness everywhere!

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
point of view I should say, moderation is the golden key to balance ourselves between two extreme points! We all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that we should be thankful and enjoy what we have. Respect and protect what we achieved
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
far while there is always room to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
. To be short and conclusive, taking the appropriate strategy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be adjusted
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
in regards to
out habits, capabilities and abilities to create a better future for everyone without mental or physical harm to selves to others.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. v. 42

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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