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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.30

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. v. 30
Every person tends to face some unacceptable situations in their life, that can be in the form of a disliking job or an insufficient finance. While some people suggest in finding out ways to overcome the former situation, others feel that it is better to make some improvements in their current circumstances. However, a conclusion can be provided only after making proper discussion in both the cases. To begin with the discussion, most of the population suffers with the circumstances related to an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. The overpopulation and the increased competition are the reason behind occurrence of such conditions. Owing to this, accepting a bad situation will always depict the maturity level in an individual and his adaptability to any type of circumstance without complaining about it. For an instance, a graduated person, who works for a lower pay in a domain different from his field of study shows his attitude of adapting to whatever he has gained. Conversely, there is a group of people, who works on the improvement in their current situation, which is the most positive approach of facing any circumstances. For an example, one of my friends who is an engineering graduate, got employed in the marketing domain. So he simply improved his knowledge in that particular field by enrolling in some related online courses. This resulted in his promotion with hikes and incentives within a year and assisted him from overcoming the problems of irrelevant work or his financial status. On recapitulating the ideas, I insist that a person is responsible for all the circumstances he undergo. So, its the utmost duty of him to change the perception and alter the condition, according to his need and ability for a better future and to face any sort of problems in the upcoming days.
Every person tends to face
some
unacceptable
situations
in their life, that can be in the form of a disliking job or an insufficient finance. While
some
people
suggest in finding out ways to overcome the former
situation
, others feel that it is better to
make
some
improvements in their
current
circumstances.
However
, a conclusion can
be provided
only
after making proper discussion in both the cases.

To
begin
with the discussion, most of the population suffers with the circumstances related to an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. The overpopulation and the increased competition are the reason behind occurrence of such conditions. Owing to this, accepting a
bad
situation
will always depict the maturity level in an individual and his adaptability to any type of
circumstance
without complaining about it. For an instance, a graduated person, who works for a lower pay in a domain
different
from his field of study
shows
his attitude of adapting to whatever he has gained.

Conversely
, there is a group of
people
, who works on the improvement in their
current
situation
, which is the most
positive
approach of facing any circumstances. For an example, one of my friends who
is
an engineering graduate,
got
employed in the marketing domain.
So
he
simply
improved
his knowledge in that particular field by enrolling in
some
related online courses. This resulted in his promotion with hikes and incentives within a year and assisted him from overcoming the problems of irrelevant work or his financial status.

On recapitulating the
ideas
, I insist that a person is responsible for all the circumstances he
undergo
.
So
,
its
the utmost duty of him to
change
the perception and alter the condition, according to his need and ability for a better future and to face any sort of problems in the upcoming days.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Learn a language, and you’ll avoid a war.
Arab Proverb

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. v. 30

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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