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Some people believe it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both the views and give your opinion. v.2

Some people believe it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. v. 2
Nowadays, people have become so lazy and expect the things to happen immediately without any hard task or dedication. In this essay we'll see about people who accept bad situations like an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money while there are others who argue that we can fight and improve these situations. Most of the teenagers these days expect things to happen quickly and they look out for success immediately. Even these people want a better life, but they are too lazy to put in the efforts. These criteria make them go to a job even if it does not pay well or even if they dislike it. For example, a good friend of mine from college still works in the company he joined first and earns less than most of our batch students. Even though he's not interested in his job, his fear to take risks and lack of motivation has kept him in the same dead end career for nearly a decade. These are the kind of people who think that taking risks might unsettle their career and so they stay in an unsatisfactory position which pays less for a long period. Then there is another set of people, who prefer to take risks and work hard so that they overcome bad situations like shortage of money or boring jobs. In spite of knowing that taking risks is not always an ideal option, these people are ready to put in the hard work to overcome these kind of situations. For example, an ex-colleague of mine found the job so boring and decided to start a business. So he quit the job and started working towards his dream. Even though he faced loads of hardships in the initial stages of his business career, he has now become a successful businessman and living his dream. In my opinion, the world nowadays is unforgiving and very competitive. In order to survive, people have to improve their skills and should work hard. Being in a dead end job for many years with any satisfaction or money will only make us regret in the near future. So it is better to work hard and make these bad situations better.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
lazy and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
the things to happen immediately without any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
task or dedication. In this essay we'll
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
accept
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
like an unsatisfactory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
or shortage of money while there are others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
argue that we can fight and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
these situations.

Most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
these days
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
things to happen
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
quickly and
they look out for success immediately. Even these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want a better life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are too lazy to put in the efforts. These criteria
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them go to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
even if it does not pay well or even if they dislike it.
For example
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
friend of mine from college
still
works in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
first
and earns less than most of our batch students.
Even though
he's not interested in his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, his fear to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
risks
and lack of motivation has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
him in the same dead
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
career for
nearly
a decade. These are the kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
risks
might unsettle their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
career and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they stay in an unsatisfactory position which pays less for a long period.

Then there is another set of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
prefer to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
risks
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they overcome
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
like shortage of money or boring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
knowing that taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
risks
is not always an ideal option, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are ready to put in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to overcome
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
.
For example
, an ex-colleague of mine found the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
boring and decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a business.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
he quit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
working towards his dream.
Even though
he faced loads of hardships in the initial stages of his business career, he has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
become a successful businessman and living his dream.

In my opinion, the world nowadays is unforgiving and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
competitive. In order to survive,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
. Being in a dead
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years with any satisfaction or money will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us regret in the near future.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it is better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
better.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Some people believe it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
366 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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