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Essay topics: Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.2

Nowadays, facing problems and difficult situations is an essential issue, particularly in our fast-changing society. Some people argue that it is logical to accept our bad situations, such as unsuitable career or economic problems, while others believe that we should tackle them and improve such conditions. I completely agree with the latter opinion although we could not do anything about some situations. Accepting situations which are not ideal for us may highly guarantee our defeat in life. When we do not try to alter our situations, we are forced to be content with our conditions, however, it is a paradox! Being unsatisfactory can have negative impacts on our life and personality, declining our confidence can be an indispensable effect. Pursuing unsatisfactory career, for example, can cause stressful life and aggressive work hours with our colleagues. In addition, having financial issues will affect our recreation activities or social life, because we miss our opportunities to spend time our friends. By contrast, fighting for our targets and goals absolutely has valuable effects on all aspects of our life. The major and worthwhile impact is increasing our self-stem sense and feeling the sense of being useful, which improve our confidence. As a consequence, we will not be ashamed of ourselves, because we are trying our best and now the results of our work does not matter. If we commence to change the situations, we will rep its benefits which will help us in future steps of life. Finally, by watching the picture of our life from the outside of the box, miracles would not happen, all of it depends on ourselves. We are miracles! In conclusion, I believe that there is no problem which cannot be solved by effort and plan, it just need a good willpower and belief in ourselves.
Nowadays, facing problems and difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
is an essential issue,
particularly
in our
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-changing society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that it is logical to accept our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
, such as unsuitable career or economic problems, while others believe that we should tackle them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
such conditions. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the latter opinion although we could not do anything about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
situations.

Accepting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
which are not ideal for us may
highly
guarantee our defeat in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. When we do not try to alter our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
, we
are forced
to be content with our conditions,
however
, it is a paradox! Being unsatisfactory can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and personality, declining our confidence can be an indispensable effect. Pursuing unsatisfactory career,
for example
, can cause stressful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and aggressive work hours with our colleagues.
In addition
, having financial issues will affect our recreation activities or social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we miss our opportunities to spend time our friends.

By contrast, fighting for our targets and goals
absolutely
has valuable effects on all aspects of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. The major and worthwhile impact is increasing our self-stem sense and feeling the sense of being useful, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our confidence. As a consequence, we will not
be ashamed
of ourselves,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we are trying our best and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
the results of our work does not matter. If we commence to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
, we will rep its benefits which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us in future steps of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Finally
, by watching the picture of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
from the outside of the box, miracles would not happen, all of it depends on ourselves. We are miracles!

In conclusion
, I believe that there is no problem which cannot
be solved
by effort and plan, it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
The pronoun ‘it’ requires a third-person verb or a past tense.
need
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
willpower and belief in ourselves.
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Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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