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Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

essaydiscussionAdvertising
Writing Structure
There are some people who believe that convincing customers to buy products when advertising is extremely successful. Meanwhile, others think that we are indifferent to advertising because it is so ubiquitous. I will present these two views in details and give my own personal opinion. Firstly, people say that advertising is very effective because it creates attention and stimulates consumer demand. More specifically, advertisements often use eye-catching images, insert into advertising videos attractive sounds such as famous songs and memorable messages to attract buyers' attention. In addition, advertising can also create an emotional connection to help consumers feel that the product is necessary and important in their lives. For example, in Nike's "Just Do It" campaign, manufacturers often add to promotional videos of Nike shoes in a variety of colors and shapes a very famous rapper song, "Lose Yourself" by Eminem makes people who intend to buy Nike shoes want to buy even more. Furthermore, this campaign also gives consumers a strong message that not only sells shoes but also encourages people to participate in sports, helping Nike build a cohesive community around the brand. Secondly, those who think that advertising is too common and difficult to attract attention also have their own opinions. We can see ads on TV, social media and websites so often that it can be difficult to distinguish between what is important and what is not. That's why many people are so annoyed with ads that they have to use ad blocking software to avoid being bothered. This leads to more and more people ignoring ads. For instance, in Vietnam, users often have to see advertisements about traditional Vietnamese medicines while using Youtube to listen to music. They feel so uncomfortable and have an aversion to traditional Vietnamese medicines that they boycott, never buy these medicines to treat diseases and find ways to block ads on Youtube. In my opinion, I prefer the first view that advertising is successful in convincing consumers because advertising plays an important role in shaping consumers' shopping behavior. In addition, advertising does not simply introduce products but also creates needs and emotions, thereby convincing consumers to choose a product or service like what Nike did to attract many buyers in the market in the example I mentioned above. In conclusion, advertising still has the ability to persuade and create demand if designed appropriately and creatively. However, excessive advertising can make users increasingly annoyed and less interested in advertising.
Introduction
Unclassified Sentences

Unclassified Sentences

Thesis Statement

Body Paragraph 1
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Body Paragraph 2
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Conclusion
Restatement of Thesis

Final Thought

Overall Band Score: 6.5
Task Achievement
6.5
The essay addresses both views and provides a personal opinion, but some arguments could be developed further with more examples and evidence.
Lexical Resource
6
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are instances of repetition and some awkward phrasing. The range of vocabulary could be expanded.
Coherence & Cohesion
6.5
The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, some ideas could be better linked, and transitions between points could be smoother.
Grammatical Range
6
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of grammatical structures, but there are errors in sentence construction and punctuation that affect clarity.

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