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Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.24

Although it is sometimes though that plenty of information ought to be shared with scientific research, business and education world, other people believe that several knowledges are highly important to be shared without any benefits. On the other hand, some people believe that information sharing with several parties allow knowledge to be extended and I agree. In other words, information sharing to wider society increase the visibility of a writer and as the result allows societies which have the same interest to contact the writer to conduct a research project. For example, cooperation between academic researchers with industry to address air pollution issues. Hence, providing free information without imposing any charges lead to the cooperation of several parties in delivering a solution for the nation. Furthermore, information sharing allows a new idea to be created and enhance, which directly provide benefits to many people. Aside from that, some people trusted that information cannot be shared freely as it is too valuable. This to assure to protect the idea of the writer which probably work hard in producing the information. For instance, a novel outcome from research managed by a university may not be shared publicly. By doing this approach, the result of the research is protected and prevent an irresponsible society to misuse the information. Another reason is that, to appreciate a group of people work which have been work hard in producing knowledge. In conclusion, while many people may vary in their opinion, I think is better to share information to substantial societies as the benefit will be wider and allow new idea and improvement of the knowledge.
Although it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
though that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
ought to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
with scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
, business and education world, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that several
Possible spelling mistake found.
knowledges
are
highly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
without any benefits.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
sharing with several parties
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
knowledge to
be extended
and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
sharing to wider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
increase the visibility of a writer and as the result
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
which have the same interest to contact the writer to conduct a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
project.
For example
, cooperation between academic researchers with industry to address air pollution issues.
Hence
, providing free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
without imposing any charges lead to the cooperation of several parties in delivering a solution for the nation.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
sharing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allows
a new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to
be created
and enhance, which
directly
provide benefits to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Aside from that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
trusted that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
cannot be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
freely
as it is too valuable. This to assure to protect the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of the writer which
probably
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
in producing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
For instance
, a novel outcome from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
managed by a university may not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
publicly
. By doing this approach, the result of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
is protected
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
an irresponsible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
to misuse the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
. Another reason is that, to appreciate a group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
work which have been work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
in producing knowledge.

In conclusion
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may vary in their opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
is better to share
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
to substantial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
as the benefit will be wider and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
and improvement of the knowledge.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Other believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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