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Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.23

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. v. 23
These days people have access to a lot of data. The question of how much information should be shared in such fields as science, business and academic world is becoming more important. It is considered by some that most information should be shared, while there are others who think it should not be shared freely. In this essay, I will discuss both views and give my own opinion. On the one hand, collaboration between people leads to faster results. When scientists exchange information freely, allowing their colleagues to read current papers, they might produce better outcomes compared to working on their own and having only their research. As a result, medical advances and new breakthroughs might be made thanks to open data. On the other hand, sharing information openly might have some detrimental impacts. People with wrong intentions might use available information for illegal purposes and, thus, such data should be safeguarded. For example, the instructions on how to make a bomb are too valuable and should not be shared freely. In addition, business people or scientists want to avoid having their work stolen. They do not reveal the details of their projects because others might profit from copying other people’s original work. I completely agree with this opinion and think that most data have to be protected and kept private. In conclusion, though sharing data might be a valuable tool, some information should not be shared freely. An obvious plus of having open data is cooperation and collaboration that might lead to a greater good. However, the disadvantages are that one might use information for wrong purposes or steal data. I believe that information should not be shared openly.
These days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have access to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
. The question of how much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
in such fields as science, business and academic world is becoming more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. It
is considered
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
, while there are others who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
. In this essay, I will discuss both views and give my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinion.

On the one hand, collaboration between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
leads
to faster results. When scientists exchange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
, allowing their colleagues to read
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
papers, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
produce better outcomes compared to working on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
and having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
their research.
As a result
, medical advances and new breakthroughs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be made
thanks to open data.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, sharing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
openly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
detrimental impacts.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
intentions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
available
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
for illegal purposes and,
thus
, such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
should
be safeguarded
.
For example
, the instructions on how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a bomb are too valuable and should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
.
In addition
, business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or scientists want to avoid having their work stolen. They do not reveal the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
of their projects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
profit from copying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
original work. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be protected
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
private.

In conclusion
, though sharing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be a valuable tool,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
. An obvious plus of having open
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
is cooperation and collaboration that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
lead to a greater
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
.
However
, the disadvantages are that one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
purposes or steal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
openly
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. v. 23

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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