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Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important to be shared freely. Discuss both views and give your opinion v.12

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important to be shared freely. 12
Information is an important and a valuable resource when conducting scientific research in business or academic contexts. In my opinion information needs to be freely available to any person who wish to carryout research even though, there are considerable reasons to refrain in sharing valuable information. With respect to sharing information, several arguments can be brought forward. Firstly, availability of information prevents the problem of recreating the wheel, which is achieving the same knowledge which has known previously. Secondly, everyone gets the opportunity to access information irrespective of their background so that everyone can contribute to knowledge. For example, people in poor countries, who do not have financial strength will have opportunity to access these information and contribute. Finally, there will be rapid advances in the knowledge since more people can contribute. However, there are points which can be considered for not sharing information freely. Firstly, there may be information which can be too important and too sensitive so that they cannot be disclosed publicly. For example, private details of people such as bank details, personal lives may not be appropriate to be shared. Also, there may be high commercial value in some information and sharing them would prevent in generating revenue from them. For example, if information on a certain groundbreaking technology is shared freely, there won’t be any market value for it as it is shared freely. In conclusion, I believe that it is better to share much information as possible to the advancement of scientific research in business and academic world.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Information
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and a valuable resource when conducting scientific research in business or academic contexts. In my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
needs to be
freely
available to any person who wish to carryout research
even though
, there are considerable reasons to refrain in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
valuable information.

With respect to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, several arguments can
be brought
forward.
Firstly
, availability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
the problem of recreating the wheel, which is achieving the same knowledge which has known previously.
Secondly
, everyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
the opportunity to access
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
irrespective of their background
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that everyone can contribute to knowledge.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in poor countries, who do not have financial strength will have opportunity to access these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and contribute.
Finally
, there will be rapid advances in the knowledge since more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can contribute.

However
, there are points which can
be considered
for not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
freely
.
Firstly
, there may be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
which can be too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and too sensitive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they cannot
be disclosed
publicly
.
For example
, private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
such as bank
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
may not be appropriate to
be shared
.
Also
, there may be high commercial value in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
them would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
in generating revenue from them.
For example
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on a certain groundbreaking technology
is shared
freely
, there won’t be any market value for it as it
is shared
freely
.

In conclusion
, I believe that it is better to share much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
as possible to the advancement of scientific research in business and academic world.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important to be shared freely. 12

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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