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Some people believe that it is good to share as much as information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too invaluable to be shared freely. Discuss both views and five your opinion. v.6

Some people believe that it is good to share as much as information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too invaluable to be shared freely. v. 6
There are varieties of researchers in the world, and the investigators are shared that very easy to over the earth each investigate in the modern society by developing technology. I am describing that some advantages and some disadvantages in this state. To begin with, when the world has very serious issues such as COVID-19 that related people's and creatur's life. The government, scientists or other specialists need to share with the public the instruction or consequences as soon as possible. Because, the virus would be killed all people who live in the world and even there are lots of crisis to leave the animals. Also, it is possible that make vaccines in a year, if the specialist would share the result or intelligence. However, there is a lot of unreliable punishment in the public, and people can see the information by mobile app such as Facebook, Instagram or twitter. Thus, if the public trusted all of the words, even they can not screening the unreliable words. On the other hand, there are some companises which have a seacret such as Toyota, Apple, Sumsoung. The companies have to competition with other companies to make more appricant society. So they need protect the kowlege or inteligence from the publish. If the companies's empoloyee share the imformation to the public, he/she would be fire because it is hurmed action to the companies. In addition, some information is very valuable and these are not essential to share freely. To sum up, in my view, there is a lot of intelligence with the earth, and people can search very easily on the internet, so the specialists have responsibility the information are believable and confidence. I believe that all information is true and helpful to this modern society.
There are varieties of researchers in the world, and the investigators
are shared
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easy to over the earth each investigate in the modern society by developing technology. I am describing that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages in this state.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, when the world has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
serious issues such as COVID-19 that related
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's and
Possible spelling mistake found.
creatur
's life. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, scientists or other specialists need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
the instruction or consequences as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
, the virus would
be killed
all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the world and even there are lots of crisis to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the animals.
Also
, it is possible that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
vaccines in a year, if the specialist would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
the result or intelligence.
However
, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
unreliable punishment in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
by mobile app such as Facebook, Instagram or twitter.
Thus
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
trusted
Consider using "all the".
all of the
words, even they can not
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "screen"
screening
the unreliable words.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
companises
which have a
Possible spelling mistake found.
seacret
such as Toyota, Apple,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sumsoung
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
competition with other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more
Possible spelling mistake found.
appricant
society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they need protect the
Possible spelling mistake found.
kowlege
or
Possible spelling mistake found.
inteligence
from the
Did you mean the noun "publishing"?
publish
. If the
Did you mean "companie's" or "companies'"?
companies's
Possible spelling mistake found.
empoloyee
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
imformation
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
, he/she would be fire
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
hurmed
action to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
valuable and these are not essential to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
freely
.

To sum up, in my view, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
intelligence with the earth, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can search
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easily
on the internet,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the specialists have responsibility the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
are believable and confidence. I believe that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is true and helpful to this modern society.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is good to share as much as information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too invaluable to be shared freely. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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