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Some people believe that it is good idea to share as much information as possible in scientific research business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to share freely. Discuss both views and give your o v.2

Some people believe that it is good idea to share as much information as possible in scientific research business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to share freely. 2
There are different opinions regarding this issue whether sharing knowledge and information in different areas such as business, science and academic world is good or people should pay to gain them. I believe it is more useful to share information freely for everyone who is interested. Some argue that enhancing individual information is not easy to share with others freely, as money and time were spent that such information gained. Having worked with many tutors, I understood they do not like to teach their students who are weak in a lesson freely due to time they spend and expenses they have in their personal life. Also, people who work for NASA, Microsoft and Google have salary and none of them work freely. In spite of the argument mentioned above the opponents argue it depends on people’s personality trait to share their information without any expectation. As they encourage people to increase their knowledge. Also, when one’s knowledge grow society’s culture and discipline will grow. For example, in business world Brian Aspi did a great job and he published all his knowledge freely in Eliots business magazine. In academic world there are many professors who teach English to students and they freely put all they information on the internet. It is believed the major progress in developed countries is that they share their information and experience with everyone. A tangible example are companies who give their employees promotion if they support their new colleague. In conclusion, I believe that sharing ideas and information with others help us to progress more in our lives.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions regarding this issue whether sharing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
areas such as business, science and academic world is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should pay to gain them. I believe it is more useful to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
for everyone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
is interested
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
argue that enhancing individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is not easy to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
with others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
, as money and time
were spent
that such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
gained. Having worked with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
tutors, I understood they do not like to teach their students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are weak in a lesson
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
due to time they spend and expenses they have in their personal life.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
work for NASA, Microsoft and Google have salary and none of them work
freely
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
the argument mentioned above the opponents argue it depends on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
personality trait to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
without any expectation.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
they encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to increase their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
.
Also
, when one’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
grow society’s culture and discipline will grow.
For example
, in business world Brian
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aspi
did a great
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
job and
he published all his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Eliots
business magazine. In academic world there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
professors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
teach English to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
students and
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freely
put all they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on the internet. It
is believed
the major progress in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
is that they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and experience with everyone. A tangible example are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
give their employees promotion if they support their new colleague.

In conclusion
, I believe that sharing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
with others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to progress more in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is good idea to share as much information as possible in scientific research business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to share freely. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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