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As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being. v.37

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being. v. 37
People are expecting to contribute a large proportion of their adult life into their career, especially when the retirement age has been postponed in many countries. Job satisfaction is the most determinant element of individual well-being because of its significant role in people’s lives. There are some widely recognised factors that are considered having positive effects on job satisfaction. First of all, whether the job is desirable can largely affect how satisfied people will be when they are doing the job every day. For example, as a horticulturist, having the opportunity to work in the best garden nursery in town would give me a very high job satisfaction. Secondly, and also equally important, the salary can influence people’s job satisfaction significantly. Although, in theory, job satisfaction is not supposed to be measured by the salary; in reality, a decent income enables people to meet their needs, which otherwise would be unmet. The dissatisfaction from the unmet needs could easily balance out the satisfaction gained from work. Moreover, the work environment and relationship with colleagues are both notable factors that would contribute to job satisfaction. Job satisfaction is so important to everyone; however, it is not realistic to believe that everyone has it. The workforce is getting more and more competitive that it is hard to land a job that is both desirable and well-paid. It is inevitable that some workers have to compromise their desires and needs to secure a position in this fierce job market. To draw the conclusion, the nature of the job and the income generated from the work affect the job satisfaction significantly. It would be a dream if everyone feels highly satisfied with work, but it is not the case in reality due to the hardship of securing a position in nowaday's labour market.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are expecting to contribute a large proportion of their adult life into their career,
especially
when the retirement age has
been postponed
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is the most determinant element of individual well-being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its significant role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
widely
Possible spelling mistake. 'recognised' is British English.
recognised
factors that
are considered
having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is desirable can
largely
affect how satisfied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will be when they are doing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
every day.
For example
, as a horticulturist, having the opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in the best garden nursery in town would give me a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
.
Secondly
, and
also
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, the salary can influence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
significantly
. Although, in theory,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is not supposed to
be measured
by the salary; in reality, a decent income enables
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their needs, which
otherwise
would be unmet. The dissatisfaction from the unmet needs could
easily
balance out the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
gained from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
environment and relationship with colleagues are both notable factors that would contribute to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
satisfaction.

Job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to everyone;
however
, it is not realistic to believe that everyone has it. The workforce is getting more and more competitive that it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to land a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that is
both desirable and well-paid. It is inevitable that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
workers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
compromise their desires and needs to secure a position in this fierce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
market.

To draw the conclusion, the nature of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and the income generated from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
significantly
. It would be a dream if everyone feels
highly
satisfied with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is not the case in reality due to the hardship of securing a position in
Possible spelling mistake found.
nowaday
's
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
market.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being. v. 37

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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