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You live in a room in college with you share with another student. However, , there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to accommodation officer at the college. In the latter, -describe the situatio v.2

You live in a room in college with you share with another student. However, , there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to accommodation officer at the college. In the latter, -describe the situatio v. 2
Dear Sir, My name is Shivani. I live in your college accommodation and I am writing in regards to some problems I have been having recently that you have made it difficult for me to concentrate my work. I am in my second year now and certainly share my room with a person who is in fourth year. While I understand that sharing a room is required for all residents in this accommodation, my roommate has been making it very difficult for me to study. The problem, is that he often invites people over for parties without telling me in advance. This was true even last week during the exam period. I have tried to reason with him but I doubt that things will change. I am hoping that you will be able to place me in a quiter room for the next semester. I apologise for the trouble, but I need to be able to study in my residence. Thank you very much for your help. Yours faithfully,
Dear Sir,

My name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Shivani
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in your college
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
accommodation and
I am writing
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
in regards to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems I have been having recently that you have made it difficult for me to concentrate my work.

I am in my second year
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
and
certainly
share my room with a person who is in fourth year. While I understand that sharing a room
is required
for all residents in this accommodation, my roommate has been making it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult for me to study.

The problem,

is that he
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
invites
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
over for parties without telling me in advance. This was true even last week during the exam period. I have tried to reason with him
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I doubt that things will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

I am hoping that you will be able to place me in a
Possible spelling mistake found.
quiter
room for the
next
semester.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
Possible spelling mistake. 'apologise' is British English.
apologise
for the trouble,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I need to be able to study in my residence.

Thank you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much for your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

Yours
faithfully
,
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS letter You live in a room in college with you share with another student. However, , there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to accommodation officer at the college. In the latter, -describe the situatio v. 2

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
169 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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