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You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the si v.5

You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the si v. 5
Dear John, I am writing to let you know the difficulties I am facing ever since I moved into room 37 in the west wing hostel. I am the new football coach here and need to wake up by 4: 00 AM every morning to train students. The room you have allotted to me is already occupied by another sophomore from this college. I am feeling uncomfortable to live along with students. Main problems: there is pandemonium in the room; he brings his friends to party sometimes and the room echoes with loud conversations or music which makes me restless in the nights. I often work late as I have to supervise the playground maintenance which starts in the late evenings and the gates close by 10: 00 PM for everyone which makes it impossible to live here. Hence, I request you to change me to the faculty accommodations at the earliest. Please inform me once there is a room availability. Until then, I am shifting my stuff to my friend’s place which is close by. Faithfully, Jack Dan
Dear John,

I am writing to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
you know the difficulties I am facing ever since I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
37 in the west wing hostel. I am the new football coach here and need to wake up by 4: 00 AM every morning to train students. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
you have allotted to me is already occupied by another sophomore from this college. I am feeling uncomfortable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
along with students.

Main problems: there is pandemonium in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
; he brings his friends to party
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
echoes with loud conversations or music which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me restless in the nights. I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
work late as I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
supervise the playground maintenance which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
in the late evenings and the gates close by 10: 00 PM for everyone which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it impossible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
here.

Hence
, I request you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
me to the faculty accommodations at the earliest.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Please
inform me once there is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
availability. Until then, I am shifting my stuff to my friend’s place which is close by.

Faithfully
,

Jack Dan
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS letter You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the si v. 5

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
178 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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