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You have received a letter from your local video shop claiming that a DVD you rented is now overdue. However, you have already returned the DVD. Write to the video shop. In your letterTell them which film the letter is aboutExplain when you returned itTel v.1

You have received a letter from your local video shop claiming that a DVD you rented is now overdue. However, you have already returned the DVD. Write to the video shop. In your letterTell them which film the letter is aboutExplain when you returned itTel v. 1
Dear Mr. Lopez, I am writing with regard to a DVD you have asked me about in your letter which I have received from your shop. First of all, it is necessary to remind you that I rented a comedy film, Funny Moments, on the 3rd of July. Then I returned it the following weak on the 10th of July as you wanted me to do. In addition, when I wanted to return the DVD, I could not find you in the shop and just your assistant was there. Therefore, I had to give it to him. When I received your letter, I was so surprised. As you know, I have always been one of your on time costumers. It might be the mistake of your assistant because when I arrived shop to return the DVD, he was too busy and the shop was too crowded. On top of these, he was calling on the phone. Could you check your inventory once again and ask your assistant carefully. It is possible, he has forgotten where has put. If you find it, please inform me. I expect to hear good news from you. Sincerely, Sarah Smith
Dear Mr. Lopez,

I am writing with regard to a DVD you have asked me about in your letter which I have received from your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it is necessary to remind you that I rented a comedy film,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Funny
Moments, on the 3rd of July. Then I returned it the following weak on the 10th of July as you wanted me to do.
In addition
, when I wanted to return the DVD, I could not find you in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
your assistant was there.
Therefore
, I had to give it to him.

When I received your letter, I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
surprised. As you know, I have always been one of your on time costumers.

It might be the mistake of your assistant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when I arrived
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
to return the DVD, he was too busy and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
was too crowded. On top of these, he was calling on the phone. Could you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
your inventory once again and ask your assistant
carefully
. It is possible, he has forgotten where has put. If you find it,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
inform me.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
to hear
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
news from you.

Sincerely
,

Sarah Smith
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS letter You have received a letter from your local video shop claiming that a DVD you rented is now overdue. However, you have already returned the DVD. Write to the video shop. In your letterTell them which film the letter is aboutExplain when you returned itTel v. 1

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
194 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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