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you have notices that there are some maintenance and hygienic related issues with a public park near the house you have recently moved to. write a letter to your local council complaining about the condition of the park v.2

you have notices that there are some maintenance and hygienic related issues with a public park near the house you have recently moved to. write a letter to your local council complaining about the condition of the park v. 2
Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing to complain about the maintenance of a public park which is located on the opposite side of my house. To begin with, I have moved to this place with my family members a couple of weeks ago. Yesterday, i have visited to a nearest park and i came back to my house within minutes just due to its maintenance problem. People visiting the park throw litter just anywhere in the park besides in a litter. Moreover, there is no watchman and some local individuals throw domestic garbage at the backside of the garden. furthermore, children frequently come into the park to play with some refreshments and they usually throw it anywhere. I am highly disappointed with the condition of the park. The dirtiness and unhygienic in the park can spread numerous ailments. I expect immediate action to taken from your side to resolve these issues. Your Faithfully, Abc
Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing to complain about the maintenance of a public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
which
is located
on the opposite side of my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to this place with my family members a couple of weeks ago. Yesterday,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
have visited to
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
nearest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
and
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
came back to my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
within minutes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
due to its maintenance problem.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
visiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
throw litter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
anywhere in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
besides
in a litter.
Moreover
, there is no watchman and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
local individuals throw domestic garbage at the backside of the garden.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
furthermore
, children
frequently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
to play with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
refreshments and
they
usually
throw it anywhere.

I am
highly
disappointed with the condition of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
. The dirtiness and unhygienic in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
can spread numerous ailments. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
immediate action to
Did you mean "take"?
taken
from your side to resolve these issues.

Did you mean "Yours"? (complimentary close)
Your
Faithfully
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Abc
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS letter you have notices that there are some maintenance and hygienic related issues with a public park near the house you have recently moved to. write a letter to your local council complaining about the condition of the park v. 2

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
152 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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