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You forgot something important on the bus you traveled on. Write a letter to the bus company and say– Describe what you are looking for. – You phoned the company before, but their response didn’t help you (explain why). – What do you want the manage v.2

You forgot something important on the bus you traveled on. Write a letter to the bus company and say– Describe what you are looking for. – You phoned the company before, but their response didn’t help you (explain why). – What do you want the manage v. 2
Dear Sir or Madam, I traveled by one of your public transportation vehicle from Ikeja to Agege on the 25th July, 2016 and forgot my international passport in the bus. The trip was scheduled for 7: 30 am and we were about eleven passengers in an eighteen-seater, blue, Toyota Hiace motor. I guess it may have dropped from my pocket, when I tried to bring out my ticket to present to the car attendant, prior to our departure. The item has a green cover and contains about thirty-two leaves. It is in a booklet form, wrapped in a black pouch, and inside one of the leaves are my personal details such as full name, date of birth and state of origin. It doesn' t contain my contact details, however. In a bid to recover it, I contacted your organization. I called the Agege office and was told that indeed an international passport with the details I provided was found in one of your automobiles, but, in line with your company' s procedure, I have to provide my trip ticket before the document can be given to me. Unfortunately, I tore and disposed it the minute I disembarked from the bus. It did not occur to me that there will be any need for it in the future. Therefore, I write so you could use your good office to release the passport to me. I understand that the check put in place is to ensure that the item is not given to the wrong person. In view of this, you may ask your staff responsible to use my driver' s licence as a means of identifying me as the true owner. I have also gotten a court affidavit an a police report to backup my claim and will present it to whoever will be attending to me. I have an examination that requires the presentation of my international passport before I will be allowed to take it. I will be waiting for your response as I hope to hear from you soon. Yours faithfully, Okoronkwo Alfred Chinedu.
Dear Sir or Madam,

I traveled by one of your public transportation vehicle from
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ikeja
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Agege
on the 25th
When specifying a month and year, the comma is unnecessary: "July 2016".
July, 2016
and forgot my international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passport
in the bus. The trip
was scheduled
for 7: 30
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
am and
we were about eleven passengers in an eighteen-seater, blue, Toyota
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hiace
motor. I guess it may have dropped from my pocket, when I tried to bring out my ticket to present to the car attendant, prior to our departure.

The item has a green cover and contains about thirty-two
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
. It is in a booklet form, wrapped in a black pouch, and inside one of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
are my personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
such as full name, date of birth and state of origin. It
Possible spelling mistake found.
doesn&
#039; t contain my contact
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
,
however
.

In a bid to recover it, I contacted your organization. I called the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Agege
office and was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
that
indeed
an international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passport
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
I provided
was found
in one of your automobiles,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, in line with your
Possible spelling mistake found.
company&
#039; s procedure, I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
provide my trip ticket
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the document can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to me. Unfortunately, I tore and disposed it the minute I disembarked from the bus. It did not occur to me that there will be any need for it in the future.

Therefore
, I write
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
you could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
office to release the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passport
to me. I understand that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
put in place is to ensure that the item is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
person. In view of this, you may ask your staff responsible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
my
Possible spelling mistake found.
driver&
#039; s
Possible spelling mistake. 'licence' is British English.
licence
as a means of identifying me as the true owner. I have
also
gotten a court affidavit
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "an" or "a" is left.
an a
police report
Did you mean "to back up"?
to backup
my claim and will present it to whoever will be attending to me. I have an examination that requires the presentation of my international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passport
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
I will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to take it.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
will be waiting for your response as I hope to hear from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Yours
faithfully
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Okoronkwo
Alfred
Possible spelling mistake found.
Chinedu
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS letter You forgot something important on the bus you traveled on. Write a letter to the bus company and say– Describe what you are looking for. – You phoned the company before, but their response didn’t help you (explain why). – What do you want the manage v. 2

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
346 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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