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You are working in giant company which does financial or other items help to the differentgroup of local community. Write to your manager about some group you want to providehelp next year. Describe a group. What help do the group need. What kind of help you v.2

You are working in giant company which does financial or other items help to the differentgroup of local community. Write to your manager about some group you want to providehelp next year. Describe a group. What help do the group need. What kind of help you v. 2
Dear Sir or Madam, As you are aware that our company provides financial or other assistance to different groups of our local community who are in need, I want to bring to your notice that one such group requested for financial assistance and I would like to help them. The group is from St. Louis public primary school. All the students of that group are not from well to do family and cannot afford basic educational resources such as textbooks and other material. Since our company works in the marketing field, the group wrote a letter to me saying that if we can find a supplier who is ready to provide them the resources they require at a discounted price. They also requested us to provide some financial assistance in purchasing the required books. I wrote a letter to their teacher and identified the exact requirements. Could we help them connect with our regular vendors who supply educational resources? The group has requested us to provide them with the financial help of $1000. I, therefore, request you to consider the application of this group and allow me to help them during the charity week that we celebrate every year. Yours sincerely, Parth Chandarana
Dear Sir or Madam,

As you are aware that our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
or other assistance to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
of our local community who are in need, I want to bring to your notice that one such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
requested for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
assistance and I would like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
is from St. Louis public primary school. All the students of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
are not from
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well to do
family and cannot afford basic educational resources such as textbooks and other material. Since our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
works in the marketing field, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
wrote a letter to me saying that if we can find a supplier who is ready to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
them the resources they require at a discounted price. They
also
requested us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
assistance in purchasing the required books.

I wrote a letter to their teacher and identified the exact requirements. Could we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them connect with our regular vendors who supply educational resources? The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
has requested us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
them with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of $1000.

I,
therefore
, request you to consider the application of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them during the charity week that we celebrate every year.

Yours
sincerely
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Parth
Possible spelling mistake found.
Chandarana
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS letter You are working in giant company which does financial or other items help to the differentgroup of local community. Write to your manager about some group you want to providehelp next year. Describe a group. What help do the group need. What kind of help you v. 2

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
202 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • You are working in giant company which does financial or other items help to the differentgroup of local community. Write to your manager about some group you want to providehelp next year. Describe a group. What help do the group need. What kind of help you v.2