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You are an university student who are living in the accommodation at the campus. One day you find something wrong with your accommodation. So you write a letter to the House Officer to tell them what happened, the reason you think, what you decide to do, v.2

You are an university student who are living in the accommodation at the campus. One day you find something wrong with your accommodation. So you write a letter to the House Officer to tell them what happened, the reason you think, what you decide to do, v. 2
Dear Sir/ Madam, I am Abhishek Singh, studying the British University and head of the hostel committee from past 5 months. I am living in the hostel from the start of course. On the behalf of our committee, I am writing this letter regarding the un-appropriate behaviour of the new vendor and his negligence regarding cleaning. From the start of my stay, hostel rooms and corridor were cleaned on the daily basis. If there was any problem in any room, previous vendor always tried to solve the problem at earliest. However, the new vendor is not taking his responsibilities seriously as rooms are now cleaned at weakly basis while corridors are not cleaned by him yet. Many students has asked him to clean their rooms on daily basis, but his behaviour becomes rude towards them. As head of hostel, I have tried to communicate and settle the issue but he is not changing his attitude. In order to solve the issue, I have asked to sign the register daily about cleaning of the rooms and solving other problems regarding water supplies. I hope you will support my move and ask the vendor to fill the register daily so that he will do his work properly. Yours sincerely Abhishek Singh
Dear Sir/ Madam,

I am Abhishek Singh, studying the British University and head of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hostel
committee from past 5 months. I am living in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hostel
from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of course
. On the behalf of our committee, I am writing this letter regarding the
Possible spelling mistake found.
un-appropriate
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vendor
and his negligence regarding cleaning.

From the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of my stay,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hostel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rooms
and corridor
were cleaned
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
basis. If there was any problem in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
, previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vendor
always tried to solve the problem at earliest.
However
, the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vendor
is not taking his responsibilities
seriously
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rooms
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
cleaned at
weakly
basis while corridors are not cleaned by him
yet
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
students
You should probably use "have", "haven".
has
asked him to clean their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rooms
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
basis,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
his
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
becomes rude towards them.

As head of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hostel
, I have tried to communicate and settle the issue
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he is not changing his attitude. In order to solve the issue, I have asked to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
the register
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
about cleaning of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rooms
and solving other problems regarding water supplies. I hope you will support my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
and ask the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vendor
to fill the register
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that he will do his work
properly
.

Yours
sincerely


Abhishek Singh
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS letter You are an university student who are living in the accommodation at the campus. One day you find something wrong with your accommodation. So you write a letter to the House Officer to tell them what happened, the reason you think, what you decide to do, v. 2

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
208 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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