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Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience v.47

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages? 47
Museums are places of great importance as they preserve the historical, religious and cultural identity of a particular nations. Museum being of a great prestigious importance and being visited by everyone of all ages, many people are of the view that the entry fees should be free. However, I am of the opinion that though it is housing artifact of great importance, preserving them would definitely involves overhead expenses. So there should be an entry free for maintaining the artifacts and heritage. In the past, where internet not being common to everyone. Parents had to take their children to the museum to have a glimpse of the artifacts and the models that was mentioned in their historical books. Ancient civilization taught in school too can be seen, which are made of wax models depicting their way of life. This really help children to visualize the ancient scenario. However many people argue that National Monuments do not have entry fee, so why should museum which houses the nation artifacts and objects need to have entry fee. In today' s world due to internet, any information is available at the finger tips. So people are referring to view monument on the mobile rather than practically viewing it. This has certainly caused reduction in the people visiting the museum. So to encourage the people to visit the museum the management needs to be competitive and remove the entry fee. This will definitely attract the new generating. I, personally believe that having entry fees would restrict unnecessary crowding of people. The fees collected would certainly be used to preserve the ancient models. There are also overheads cost in maintaining the premises which cannot be neglected. Lavatories which are open to public, due to number of people using them they need cleaning regularly. This too involves cost. Similarly, the security system and personal installed to safe guard the expensive monuments involves cost. So with all these overhead and cost involved, the management has to levy a small fees in maintaining the asset of the nation. This according to me is justified. In conclusion, for the museum to run successfully and to preserve the monuments and artifacts. Continuously inflow of funds are required by the management. There is no way the museum can generate revenue apart from imposing entry fees on visitors. If government funds the museum as a part of restoration program then the entry fees will definitely be withdrawn.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museums
are places of great importance as they preserve the historical, religious and cultural identity of a particular
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "nation"?
nations
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
being of a great prestigious importance and
being visited
by everyone of all ages,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are of the view that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
should be free.
However
, I am of the opinion that though it is housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artifact
of great importance, preserving them would definitely
The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: "involve"
involves
overhead expenses.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
there should be an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
free for maintaining the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artifacts
and heritage.

In the past, where internet not being common to everyone. Parents had to take their children to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
to have a glimpse of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artifacts
and the models that
was mentioned
in their historical books. Ancient civilization taught in school too can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
, which
are made
of wax models depicting their way of life. This
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
children to visualize the ancient scenario.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that National
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Monuments
do not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
why should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
the nation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artifacts
and objects need to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s world due to internet, any information is available at the finger tips.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are referring to view
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
monument
on the mobile
rather
than
practically
viewing it. This has
certainly
caused reduction in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
visiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
to encourage the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to visit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
the management needs to be competitive and remove the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
. This will definitely attract the new generating.

I,
personally
believe that having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
would restrict unnecessary crowding of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
collected would
certainly
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to preserve the ancient models. There are
also
overheads
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
in maintaining the premises which cannot
be neglected
. Lavatories which are open to public, due to number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
using them they need cleaning
regularly
. This too involves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
.
Similarly
, the security system and personal installed to safe guard the expensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
monuments
involves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
with all these overhead and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
involved, the management
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
levy a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
in maintaining the asset of the nation. This according to me
is justified
.

In conclusion
, for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
to run
successfully
and to preserve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
monuments
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artifacts
.
Continuously
inflow of funds
are required
by the management. There is no way the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
can generate revenue apart from imposing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
on visitors. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
funds the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
as a part of restoration program then the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
will definitely be withdrawn.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
46Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS letter Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages? 47

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
405 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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