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Writing task 1 (a letter)You work for an international company. Recently your job has changed and you believe that more training is needed. Write a letter to your manager and say- How has your job changed? - Describe a type of training you will need. - Sugg v.1

Writing task 1 (a letter)You work for an international company. Recently your job has changed and you believe that more training is needed. Write a letter to your manager and say- How has your job changed? - Describe a type of training you will need. - Sugg v. 1
Dear Mr. Smirnov, I am writing with regard to my new role as GIS-analyst and my expanded duties as well. As you know, I have been working in our company since 2015 and all this period I worked as part of our GIS team and my main duty was maintaining GIS-data base and coordinating field works. However, today I am in charge of the whole crew and every project of the cartographic department. Frankly speaking, I do not have enough managing skills, especially of the financial part of a project. Therefore, I would like to attend three months course for GIS project management. The course is conducted in Australian Institute of Remote Sensing and complete cost of it is 2000 AU. It is a compatible price and include full time training as well as it is one of the best courses among similar ones. On top of project cost management, the course will cover project risk management. As it is a full time course, I would like to ask you for educational leave from 1st of May till 31st of July. I have made all of the arrangements; my deputy will be able to manage all open projects. I am going to be in touch with him and if any unforeseen circumstances appears, I will handle it. Thank you in advance for your kind cooperation. Best regards, Maria
Dear Mr.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Smirnov
,

I am writing with regard to my new role as GIS-analyst and my expanded duties
as well
.

As you know, I have been working in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
since 2015 and all this period I worked as part of our GIS team and my main duty was maintaining GIS-data base and coordinating field works.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
I am in charge of the whole crew and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
of the cartographic department.

Frankly
speaking, I do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
managing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
especially
of the financial part of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
.
Therefore
, I would like to attend three months
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
for GIS
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
management. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
is conducted
in Australian Institute of Remote Sensing and complete cost of it is 2000 AU. It is a compatible price and include full time training
as well
as it is one of the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
among similar ones. On top of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
cost management, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
will cover
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
management.

As it is a full time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
, I would like to ask you for educational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
from 1st of May till 31st of July. I have made
Consider using "all the".
all of the
arrangements; my deputy will be able to manage all open
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
. I am going to be in touch with him and if any unforeseen circumstances appears, I will handle it.

Thank you in advance for your kind cooperation.

Best regards,

Maria
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS letter Writing task 1 (a letter)You work for an international company. Recently your job has changed and you believe that more training is needed. Write a letter to your manager and say- How has your job changed? - Describe a type of training you will need. - Sugg v. 1

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
227 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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