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Write a letter to a city planning manager about demolition of a historical building in your area and say– Explain why it shouldn’t be demolished. – Suggest a future use for this building. – Recommend a way to raise money for repairs. v.2

Write a letter to a city planning manager about demolition of a historical building in your area and say– Explain why it shouldn’t be demolished. – Suggest a future use for this building. – Recommend a way to raise money for repairs. v. 2
Dear Sir/Madam, My name is James and I am resident of 289/2 South Avenue Brampton. Recently, I came to know about the plans of planning council to demolish the 300 years old building, ' ' THE EMPIRE SQUARE' ' . I am writing this letter to raise my concern about this decision as I think this decision is taken in hurry and the importance and significance of this site is not considered before taking this type of decision. Lets me explain you the reasons why this place is so important for your city. Firstly, it is one of the prestigious buildings from late 16th century. This building is a pride of our city. Apart from its historical importance this building represents the power, as in was the main commercial center of trade in ancient times. I would like to suggest you that in place of demolishing this site, you can renovate this old building into an Arts Gallery. As this building is having large corridors and big halls so they can be easily converted into galleries for showing arts such as paintings, sculptures, statues, handicraft and others antiques. I hope this is the best solution to restore the glory of this site. The planning council can organize an fund raising event for this building so that the people like me who want to keep this building can come forward to donate money for its repairs. Once this site got converted into Arts Gallery, a ticket of nominal amount can be charged for the visitors so that the new Art Gallery can make some money for salaries of staff and further maintenance in future if required. Hope you will consider my suggestions positively and take necessary steps in this direction. Yours faithfully, James
Dear Sir/Madam,

My name is
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
James and
I am resident of 289/2 South Avenue Brampton. Recently, I came to know about the plans of planning council to demolish the 300 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
, ' ' THE EMPIRE
Possible spelling mistake found.
SQUARE&
#039; '
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
I am writing this letter to raise my concern about this decision as I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this decision
is taken
in hurry and the importance and significance of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
is not considered
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
taking this type of decision.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Lets
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
The verb 'to explain something to someone' requires a preposition.
you
the reasons why this place is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for your city.
Firstly
, it is one of the prestigious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
from late 16th century. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
is a pride of our city. Apart from its historical importance this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
represents the power, as in was the main commercial center of trade in ancient times. I would like to suggest you that in place of demolishing this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
, you can renovate this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
into an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Gallery
. As this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
is having large corridors and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
halls
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can be
easily
converted into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
for showing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
such as paintings, sculptures, statues, handicraft
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
antiques.

I hope this is the best solution to restore the glory of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
. The planning council can organize
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
fund raising
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
like me who want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to donate money for its repairs. Once this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
converted into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Gallery
, a ticket of nominal amount can
be charged
for the visitors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Gallery
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money for salaries of staff and
further
maintenance in future if required.

Hope you will consider my suggestions
positively
and take necessary steps in this direction.

Yours
faithfully
,

James
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
I love commuting between languages just like I love commuting between cultures and cities.
Elif Safak

IELTS letter Write a letter to a city planning manager about demolition of a historical building in your area and say– Explain why it shouldn’t be demolished. – Suggest a future use for this building. – Recommend a way to raise money for repairs. v. 2

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
291 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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