Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

thevline graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian from 1975 to 2000. v.2

thevline graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian from 1975 to 2000. v. 2
The given line graph compares the fast food consumption of Australian teenagers between 1975 to 2000. The most striking feature to be observed is that hamburgers and pizzas was gaining prevalence among youngster. It can be vividly seen that from 1975 to 1995, the use of pizza upsurged from 1 to 80 times a year. Between 1995 to 2000, the trend of eating pizza stayed constant at 85 times a year. Further, from 1975 to 1985, the figure of fish and chips followed a decreasing trend falling from 100 to 80 times a year. The use of fish and chips was 65 times a year but it curtailed to 39 times a year in 2000. Turning to rest of description, between 1975 to 1985, the figure of hamburgers made a remarkable improvement, rising from 10 to 85 tines a year. after that it upsurge slowly. As far as comparison is concerned, In the starting years young people prefer more fish and chips but it declined sharply compare to pizza and hamburgers. in 1990, the consumption of pizza' s overtook the consumption of fish and chips.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
line graph compares the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food consumption of Australian
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1975 and 2000".
between 1975 to 2000
.

The most striking feature to
be observed
is that hamburgers and pizzas was gaining prevalence among youngster.

It can be
vividly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that from 1975 to 1995, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of pizza upsurged from 1 to 80
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "Between 1995 and 2000".
Between 1995 to 2000
, the trend of eating pizza stayed constant at 85
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
Further
, from 1975 to 1985, the figure of fish and chips followed a decreasing trend falling from 100 to 80
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of fish and chips was 65
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it curtailed to 39
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
in 2000.

Turning to rest of description,
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1975 and 1985".
between 1975 to 1985
, the figure of hamburgers made a remarkable improvement, rising from 10 to 85 tines a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
after
that it upsurge
slowly
. As far as comparison
is concerned
, In the starting years young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer more fish and chips
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it declined
sharply
compare to pizza and hamburgers.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
1990, the consumption of
Possible spelling mistake found.
pizza&
#039; s overtook the consumption of fish and chips.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS letter thevline graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian from 1975 to 2000. v. 2

Letter
  American English
4 paragraphs
185 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts