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The map below is of the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the Supermarket. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. v.6

The map below is of the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the Supermarket.
The diagrams shows the basic layout and transportation information of Garlsdon Town and illustrate two alternatives places for a new supermarket. The most apparent difference between two of them is that one are located in the town center, while the other are placed in the countryside. However, both of them are adjacent to the railway and main roads. As a small town with a population of 6500, Garlsdon owns a typical multi-circle layout. The outer layer from center are used for industry when housing areas are concentrated in two parts of north region and south region. S2 are surrounded by a large number of industry factories and may be effected by pollution, while S1 have the advantage of countryside, beautiful views, fresh air and cheap land price. The railway crossed the center from north-west to south-east. Besides, there are three main roads connecting Garlsdon with three other smaller towns. The north-west road are 12km away from Hindon with 10, 000 people. You can drive 25km southesast to Cransdon, a village with 29, 000 citizens. Finally, Bransdon are located 16km away in the south-west of Garlsdon, owning 15000 people. Because of the center location, S2 can reach more customers than S1, while people can find parking lots and stay away from traffic congestion more easily if they visit S1.
The diagrams
You should probably use "show".
shows
the basic layout and transportation information of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Garlsdon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Town
and illustrate two alternatives places for a new supermarket.

The most apparent difference between two of them is that one
are located
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
center, while the other
are placed
in the countryside.
However
, both of them are adjacent to the railway and main roads.

As a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
with a population of 6500,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Garlsdon
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owns
a typical multi-circle layout. The outer layer from center are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for industry when housing areas
are concentrated
in two parts of north region and south region. S2
are surrounded
by
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
industry factories and may
be effected
by pollution, while S1 have the advantage of countryside,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
views, fresh air and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
land price.

The railway crossed the center from north-west to south-east.
Besides
, there are three main roads connecting
Possible spelling mistake found.
Garlsdon
with three other smaller
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
towns
. The north-west road are
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "12 km"
12km
away from
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hindon
with 10, 000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. You can drive
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "25 km"
25km
Possible spelling mistake found.
southesast
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cransdon
, a village with 29, 000 citizens.
Finally
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bransdon
are located
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "16 km"
16km
away in the south-west of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Garlsdon
, owning 15000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the center location, S2 can reach more customers than S1, while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can find parking lots and stay away from traffic congestion more
easily
if they visit S1.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Mistakes

IELTS letter The map below is of the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the Supermarket.

Letter
  American English
4 paragraphs
218 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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