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The chart below shows the percentage of female members of parliament in 5 European countries from 2000 to 2012. v.1

The chart below shows the percentage of female members of parliament in 5 European countries from 2000 to 2012. v. 1
The line graph shows the proportions of woman members of parliament in 5 different countries in Europe between 2000 and 2012. It is clear that the percentages of woman in those countries namely took part in parliament have increased almost all the time surveyed. Furthermore, UK has seen the fastest raise in this figure. In 2000, the percentage of female in Germany ' s parliament was highest, at about 33 percent. The figures for Italy and France were lower, stand by over 25 percent. Belgium and UK saw the lowest proportions of parliament female member, which accounted for approximately 17 percent and 3 percent respectively. The period from 2000 to 2012 saw the highest raise in the proportion of UK female joined parliament, by about 20 percent to approximately 23 percent, which equal to the figure of Belgium. Over the same period, the figures for France and Germany climbed slowly, to about 32 percent and 38 percent respectively. Meanwhile, Italy saw a significant increase in the proportion of female members in parliament, which overcame figure of Germany to nearly 40 percent.
The line graph
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shows
the proportions of woman members of
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parliament
in 5
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different
countries in Europe between 2000 and 2012.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the percentages of woman in those countries
namely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
took part
in
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parliament
have increased almost all the time surveyed.
Furthermore
, UK has
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seen
the fastest raise in this figure.

In 2000, the percentage of
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female
in Germany ' s
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parliament
was highest, at about 33
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percent
. The
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figures
for Italy and France were lower, stand by over 25
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percent
. Belgium and UK
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saw
the lowest proportions of
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parliament
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female
member, which accounted for approximately 17
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percent
and 3
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percent
respectively
.

The period from 2000 to 2012
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saw
the highest raise in the
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proportion
of UK
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female
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joined
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parliament
, by about 20
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percent
to approximately 23
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percent
, which equal to the
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figure
of Belgium. Over the same period, the
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figures
for France and Germany climbed
slowly
, to about 32
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percent
and 38
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percent
respectively
. Meanwhile, Italy
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saw
a significant increase in the
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proportion
of
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female
members in
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parliament
, which overcame
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figure
of Germany to
nearly
40
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percent
.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS letter The chart below shows the percentage of female members of parliament in 5 European countries from 2000 to 2012. v. 1

Letter
  American English
4 paragraphs
181 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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