Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

the charts below changes in the proportion of the energy produced from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003 v.2

the charts below changes in the proportion of the energy produced from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003 v. 2
The two pie charts illustrate the information about how the percentage of the energy manufactured from separate resources transforms in particular country in 1985 and 2003. Overall, while the percentage of nuclear and oil saw a significant decrease, an exponential growth was experienced in the proportion of natural gas, coal and other renewable, with a noticeable exception for hydro, which remained steady over the given period. However, oil was the most popular resource to produce energy in both recorded years. According to two pie charts, oil was recorded the first ranking in 1985, at 52% and then it dropped significantly to 39% in 2003, yet it still remained the most popular resource among 6 separate resources. The percentage of nuclear made of 22% in 1985, followed by the approximately threefold fall in 2003, at 8%. By contrast, energy produced by hydro remained unchanged in both year 1985 and 2003. It can be clearly to seen that, the percentage of other renewable accounted for only 1%, which was the lowest percentage in 1985, before a remarkable increase in 2003, at 4%. 22% of coal was observed in 1985, outpacing the figure in 2003 by 14%. Likewise, the proportion of natural gas being the third ranking in 1985, at 13%, exceeded that of coal to become the second popular resource, at 23% at the end of the given period.
The two pie charts illustrate the information about how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of the energy manufactured from separate resources transforms
in particular
country in 1985 and 2003.

Overall
, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of nuclear and oil
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a significant decrease, an exponential growth
was experienced
in the proportion of natural gas, coal and other renewable, with a noticeable exception for hydro, which remained steady over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.
However
, oil was the most popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
resource
to produce energy in both recorded years.

According to two pie charts, oil
was recorded
the
first
ranking in 1985, at 52% and then it dropped
significantly
to 39% in 2003,
yet
it
still
remained the most popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
resource
among 6 separate resources. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of nuclear made of 22% in 1985, followed by the approximately threefold fall in 2003, at 8%. By contrast, energy produced by hydro remained unchanged in both year 1985 and 2003.

It can be
clearly
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of other renewable accounted for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1%, which was the lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
in 1985,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
a remarkable increase in 2003, at 4%. 22% of coal
was observed
in 1985, outpacing the figure in 2003 by 14%.
Likewise
, the proportion of natural gas being the third ranking in 1985, at 13%, exceeded that of coal to become the second popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
resource
, at 23% at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS letter the charts below changes in the proportion of the energy produced from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003 v. 2

Letter
  American English
4 paragraphs
227 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts