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A friend has asked you to babysit on Saturday and wants to know how much you charge per hour for this. Unfortunately, you already have a commitment this weekend and cannot help. However, you are free the following weekend. v.3

A friend has asked you to babysit on Saturday and wants to know how much you charge per hour for this. Unfortunately, you already have a commitment this weekend and cannot help. However, you are free the following weekend. v. 3
Dear Elena, Hope you are doing great and I am excited to read about all your recent news. I have received your message, asking me to help you babysit your little daughter on coming Saturday. I really appreciate the fact that you have actually cared to think of me as a suitable babysitter to look after your little daughter, but I regret to inform you that despite my best intention, I won’t be able to help you this coming weekend. In fact, this coming weekend, I have already made plans to visit one of my younger cousins in another city because she is going to celebrate her 21st birthday. By the way, my cousin is a bit emotional person, and cancelling the programme to visit her would certainly make her upset. So, again, I am really sorry that I won’t be able to help you out this coming weekend, but please rest assured that I would be able to help you out in the following weekend. By the way, I charge hourly, and the hourly rate is 200 Rouble (Russian). But, please trust me, the rate of charge wouldn’t be an issue when I babysit your daughter. Warm wishes, Anna Irina More helpful resources: Band 8/9 IELTS Letter Samples with tips to reach this level
Dear Elena,

Hope you are doing
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
great and
I
am excited
to read about all your recent news. I have received your message, asking me to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you babysit your
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
daughter on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coming
Saturday. I
really
appreciate the fact that you have actually cared to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of me as a suitable babysitter to look after your
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
daughter,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I regret to inform you that despite my best intention, I won’t be able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coming
weekend.

In fact, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coming
weekend, I have already made plans to visit one of my younger cousins in another city
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
she is going to celebrate her 21st birthday. By the way, my cousin is a bit emotional person, and cancelling the
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
to visit her would
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
her upset.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, again, I am
really
sorry that I won’t be able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you out this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coming
weekend,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
rest assured that I would be able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you out in the following weekend. By the way, I charge hourly, and the hourly rate is 200 Rouble (Russian).
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
trust me, the rate of charge wouldn’t be an issue when I babysit your daughter.

Warm wishes,

Anna Irina

More helpful resources: Band 8/9 IELTS Letter Samples with tips to reach this level
0Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS letter A friend has asked you to babysit on Saturday and wants to know how much you charge per hour for this. Unfortunately, you already have a commitment this weekend and cannot help. However, you are free the following weekend. v. 3

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
214 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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