Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

blob: https: //web. whatsapp. com/e59405e1-8f8e-437a-a69a-ed50f30d0337The charts below show household spending patterns in two countries between 1980 and 2008. v.2

blob: https: //web. whatsapp. com/e59405e1-8f8e-437a-a69a-ed50f30d0337The charts below show household spending patterns in two countries between 1980 and 2008. v. 2
A breakdown of the percentage of household spending patterns in two different nations between 1980 and 2008 is presented in the diagram. Between 1980 and 2008, UK’s leisure showed a slightly decrease as similarly as food and drink in New Zealand but it was still notable as the highest of others. But food and drink in UK decreased more significant than others. In other hand, there was a less decline of the percentage New Zealand’s leisure and transport in both countries over those periods. By contrast, there had been a slight incline in utility exactly in the percentage of UK from 26 to just over a quarter. Whereas New Zealand’s utility had showed an increase sharply to just over a third. In the other hand, others in both countries had remained reasonably steady between two years. Overall, Although, UK’ leisure and New Zealand’s food and drink showed a decline as the same as some others, but the total percentage of households showed that both of them remained dominance as the highest of others. In other side, during those period saw a steady remain in others in both nations. While, there had been a good marked growth in both countries’ utility
A breakdown of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of household spending patterns in two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations between 1980 and 2008
is presented
in the diagram.

Between 1980 and 2008, UK’s leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
showed
a
You used an adverb ('slightly') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('decrease') instead of another adjective.
slightly decrease
as
similarly
as food and drink in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
Zealand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it was
still
notable as the highest of others.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
food and drink in UK decreased more significant than others. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there was a less decline of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
Zealand’s leisure and transport in both countries over those periods.

By contrast, there had been a slight incline in utility exactly in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of UK from 26 to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over a quarter.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
Zealand’s utility had
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
showed
an increase
sharply
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over a third. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, others in both countries had remained
reasonably
steady between two years.

Overall
, Although, UK’ leisure and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
Zealand’s food and drink
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
showed
a decline as the same as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of households
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
showed
that both of them remained dominance as the highest of others. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
side, during those period
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a steady remain in others in both nations.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, there had been a
Make sure that the adjective 'good' is correct. Possibly, it should be an adverb (typically ~ly) that modifies 'marked'. Possibly, it should be the first word in a compound adjective (hyphenated adjective). Possibly, it is correct.
good marked
growth in both countries’ utility
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS letter blob: https: //web. whatsapp. com/e59405e1-8f8e-437a-a69a-ed50f30d0337The charts below show household spending patterns in two countries between 1980 and 2008. v. 2

Letter
  American English
4 paragraphs
199 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts