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28. 09. 2017New neighbours have recently moved into the house/flat next door to where you live. You have examinations soon, but your neighbours play music late at night which is affecting your studies and sleep. Write a letter to your neighbours. In your let v.2

28. 09. 2017New neighbours have recently moved into the house/flat next door to where you live. You have examinations soon, but your neighbours play music late at night which is affecting your studies and sleep. Write a letter to your neighbours. In your let v. 2
Dear Mr. and Ms. Smith, I am your next door neighbor and I am writing to complain about the loud music that is played in your flat. To begin with, I am a graduate student and I have to prepare for important exams. Unfortunately, the music that usually is played late at night in your apartment does not allow me to concentrate on studying; moreover, because of the loud noise, I have insomnia. In other words, your love for rock music has had an adverse effect on my sleep and academic performance. Primarily, the incoming examinations are really difficult and require a lot of effort and concentration but your habit to listen to music late at night makes it almost impossible to rest well or study. In fact, I can fell asleep only when the music stopped and when I go to bed earlier, before the music starts, I have terrible nightmares. Consequently, because of your conduct, I have a lack of sleep and it undermines my ability to stay focused on studying. I see two possible solutions. Firstly, I would like that you started using headphones. They will allow you to listen to your favorite singers and groups at any time you wish. Secondly, if you can’t stand using headphones, I would recommend listening to music during a day or in the morning. I hope that it needn’t remind you that creating noise after 10: 00 pm is prohibited by the law and if you continue acting in the same vein, police and your landlord will be informed. Sincerely yours, Eugene Dubinchuk.
Dear Mr. and Ms. Smith,

I am your
next
door
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
neighbor and
I am writing to complain about the loud
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
that
is played
in your flat.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, I am a graduate student and I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
prepare for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
exams. Unfortunately, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
that
usually
is played
late at night in your apartment does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to concentrate on studying;
moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the loud noise, I have insomnia.
In other words
, your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
for rock
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
has had an adverse effect on my sleep and academic performance.

Primarily
, the incoming examinations are
really
difficult and require
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
effort and concentration
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
your habit to listen to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
late at night
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it almost impossible to rest well or study. In fact, I can
This form is ambiguous and can be used as past tense. Confirm that you are using the intended base form of the main verb after 'to do' as an auxiliary verb..
fell
asleep
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
and when I go to bed earlier,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
, I have terrible nightmares.
Consequently
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of your conduct, I have a lack of sleep and it undermines my ability to stay focused on studying.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
two possible solutions.
Firstly
, I would like that you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
using headphones. They will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
you to listen to your favorite singers and groups at any time you wish.
Secondly
, if you can’t stand using headphones, I would recommend listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
during a day or in the morning. I hope that it needn’t remind you that creating noise after 10: 00 pm
is prohibited
by the law and if you continue acting in the same vein, police and your landlord will
be informed
.

Sincerely
yours,

Eugene
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dubinchuk
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS letter 28. 09. 2017New neighbours have recently moved into the house/flat next door to where you live. You have examinations soon, but your neighbours play music late at night which is affecting your studies and sleep. Write a letter to your neighbours. In your let v. 2

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • 28. 09. 2017New neighbours have recently moved into the house/flat next door to where you live. You have examinations soon, but your neighbours play music late at night which is affecting your studies and sleep. Write a letter to your neighbours. In your let v.2