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18/09/2017You have a full-time job and are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. Write a letter to the course tutor. In your letter. Describe the situationExplain why you cannot continue at this timeSay what v.2

18/09/2017You have a full-time job and are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. Write a letter to the course tutor. In your letter. Describe the situationExplain why you cannot continue at this timeSay what v. 2
Dear Mr. Smith, I am writing to inform you that I discontinue the course. I work in an insurance company and my boss told me that I need to improve my English if I want to get a promotion to a manager position. Consequently, I decided to enroll in your Business English course. It appears that all my hard work pays off because I have been recently given a proposal to become a head of the department in which I currently work. Unfortunately, although I have a desire to continue studying, it seems to be impossible. Firstly, my novel job requires working extended hours. I used to finish my day at 6: 00 pm but nowadays I have to work till 9: 30 pm. Secondly, I have just moved from my apartments that were located near the school to a new house that is near my office to save my time on commuting. Thus, I will not have enough time to continue my course. Finally, I would like to get a full refund for the next term because I paid in advance. It will be convenient to get my money on my credit card. I would also like to sell my textbooks. They are hardly used, so maybe someone of your listeners would like to buy them for a half of the price. I am waiting for your prompt response. Sincerely yours, Eugene Dubinchuk
Dear Mr. Smith,

I am writing to inform you that I discontinue the course.

I work in an insurance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
and my boss
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
me that I need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
my English if I want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a promotion to a manager position.
Consequently
, I decided to enroll in your Business English course. It appears that all my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work pays off
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I have been recently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
a proposal to become a head of the department in which I
currently
work.

Unfortunately, although I have a desire to continue studying, it seems to be impossible.
Firstly
, my novel job requires working extended hours. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to finish my day at 6: 00 pm
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
nowadays I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work till 9: 30 pm.
Secondly
, I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
from my apartments that
were located
near the school to a new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
that is
near my office to save my time on commuting.
Thus
, I will not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to continue my course.

Finally
, I would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a full refund for the
next
term
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I paid in advance. It will be convenient to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
my money on my credit card. I would
also
like to sell my textbooks. They are hardly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
maybe someone of your listeners would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
them for a half of the price.

I am waiting for your prompt response.

Sincerely
yours,

Eugene
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dubinchuk
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS letter 18/09/2017You have a full-time job and are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. Write a letter to the course tutor. In your letter. Describe the situationExplain why you cannot continue at this timeSay what v. 2

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
233 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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