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05. 10. 2017The company you work for has decided to close the cafeteria as staff are not using it much. You are unhappy about it. Write a letter to the supervisor / director (someone in authority)- Asking not to close it- Inform what feel is the cause of st v.2

05. 10. 2017The company you work for has decided to close the cafeteria as staff are not using it much. You are unhappy about it. Write a letter to the supervisor / director (someone in authority)- Asking not to close it- Inform what feel is the cause of st v. 2
Dear Mr. Smith I work as an accountant in your firm and from a recent e-mail, I learned about closing the cafeteria due to its unpopularity. I am writing in a hope that the management may rethink the decision. In fact, the staff need have the cafe because only a small number of employees take home-made meals with them and the rest of the staff do not eat anything while being in the workplace. This situation has an adverse effect on their health and at least half of colleagues have issues with their stomachs. It appears people avoid the local cafeteria because the meals served are tasteless at best and look terrible. Moreover, a large proportion of personnel are vegetarians who cannot eat meat, eggs and fish; thus, the absence of wholesome, healthy vegetarian options deters them from visiting the café. The troublesome situation may be addressed if the place has a new menu with vegetables, fruits and dairy products such as fatless yogurts. Hiring new staff for the kitchen of the café will have a benevolent influence on the quality of food and constant monitoring of cooked meals will prevent the repetition of the problem. Sincerely yours, Eugene Dubinchuk.
Dear Mr. Smith

I work as an accountant in your firm and from a recent e-mail, I learned about closing the cafeteria due to its unpopularity. I am writing in a hope that the management may rethink the decision. In fact, the staff need have the
cafe
because
only
a
small
number of employees take home-made meals with them and the rest of the staff do not eat anything while being in the workplace. This situation has an adverse effect on their health and at least half of colleagues have issues with their stomachs.

It appears
people
avoid the local cafeteria
because
the meals served are tasteless at best and look terrible.
Moreover
, a large proportion of personnel are vegetarians who cannot eat meat, eggs and fish;
thus
, the absence of wholesome, healthy vegetarian options deters them from visiting the café.

The troublesome situation may
be addressed
if the place has a new menu with vegetables, fruits and dairy products such as
fatless
yogurts. Hiring new staff for the kitchen of the café will have a benevolent influence on the quality of food and constant monitoring of cooked meals will
prevent
the repetition of the problem.

Sincerely
yours,

Eugene
Dubinchuk
.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS letter 05. 10. 2017The company you work for has decided to close the cafeteria as staff are not using it much. You are unhappy about it. Write a letter to the supervisor / director (someone in authority)- Asking not to close it- Inform what feel is the cause of st v. 2

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
200 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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