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You’re interested in a music course that you saw on an advertise. Write a letter to the club. In your letter, you should: explain why you’re interestedrequest more information about the coursetalk about your past experiences. v.1

You’re interested in a music course that you saw on an advertise. Write a letter to the club. In your letter, you should: explain why you’re interestedrequest more information about the coursetalk about your past experiences. v. 1
While teachers used to teach all aspects of life to students after starting their school course, the recent decades have seen a rise in the amount of time parents can spend with their children. It seems to reinforce child skills, school teachers cannot play a role as efficiently as parents. Youngsters have been affected by teachers since their instruction begins. The child’s potential will be ameliorated by doing various courses in schools. Different teachers will work on motley sides of student abilities. To illustrate, psychology is one of the most crucial subjects which teachers try to beef-up this quality of the young. Furthermore, teachers have to turn-round children physically. Child’s social skills must be considered by teachers who endeavour to improve them. Not only do these activities important in their schools, but they are extremely significant in their future social life. Most individuals and I reckon parents have much more impressive than teachers for children since they go to school. Parents ought to spend a large amount of time to buttress child qualities. Children spend twofold time they stay with their teachers, with their parents. Children compassion and sentiments must be ameliorated by parents brilliantly activities. Students will have numerous bereft on their learning course. Parents have to cover their institution learning dearths which solving them are exceedingly dominant in children’s future. Child skills amplification from whole facets is prominent in their lives. To sum up, most individuals accept that after a youngster begins instruction, their guardians will have more impact than their instructors.
While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to teach all aspects of life to students after starting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
course, the recent decades have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a rise in the amount of time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
can spend with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. It seems to reinforce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
cannot play a role as
efficiently
as parents.

Youngsters have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
since their instruction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
potential will
be ameliorated
by doing various courses in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
will work on motley sides of student abilities. To illustrate, psychology is one of the most crucial subjects which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
try to beef-up this quality of the young.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
turn-round
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
physically
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Child’s
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be considered
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
who
Possible spelling mistake. 'endeavour' is British English.
endeavour
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
them. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do these activities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are
extremely
significant in their future social life.

Most individuals and I reckon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have much more impressive than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
since they go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
ought to spend a large amount of time to buttress
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
qualities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
spend twofold time they stay with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
, with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
compassion and sentiments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be ameliorated
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
brilliantly
activities. Students will have numerous bereft on their learning course.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
cover their institution learning dearths which solving them are
exceedingly
dominant in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
future.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
amplification from whole facets is prominent in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

To sum up, most individuals accept that after a youngster
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
instruction, their guardians will have more impact than their instructors.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay You’re interested in a music course that you saw on an advertise. Write a letter to the club. In your letter, you should: explain why you’re interestedrequest more information about the coursetalk about your past experiences. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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