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You saw an advertisement for a skiing course in Canada but you have one or two problems and can’t stay for the whole course. Write a letter to the course director. In your letter• explain your interest in the course• describe your problems• find ou v.1

You saw an advertisement for a skiing course in Canada but you have one or two problems and can’t stay for the whole course. Write a letter to the course director. In your letter• explain your interest in the course• describe your problems• find ou v. 1
Today, almost all major corporations move their operation offshore for a number of reasons. These international players should fulfil to the highest level their responsibilities to the local community where their headquarters or subsidiaries are based. Firstly, they should actively contribute to the local economy as a corporate taxpayer. Local tax authorities often struggle navigating their financial matrix, partly because of the complicated nature of these companies whose capital flows in all directions. Another reason for this is that these deep-pocketed corporations may employ sophisticated instruments to evade local taxes. Therefore, the local economy would run a deficit if it fails to hold these companies accountable for tax paying responsibilities. Secondly, these global companies should be fully committed to environmental responsibilities. As a common practice, manufacturing is moved from developed countries to developing or underdeveloped countries. The lax environmental law of the host country means that manufacturing often takes a toll on the environment while local communities are crippled by pollution. For this reason, it is vital that international companies operate within the legal bounds of local and international environmental regulations. Finally, international companies should actively contribute to the sustainable development of the local workforce. Manufacturing, as a significant part of their offshore operation, is usually labour-intensive; however, little does it brighten the future of its workers. As often the case, these employees are trapped in low-skilled assembly jobs and horrendous working conditions. Therefore, it is imperative that international companies join forces with local authorities to build a highly skilled workforce for the good of the host country. In conclusion, I believe that international companies should seek to fulfil all responsibilities to the local community. Nevertheless, only by including details of the responsibilities in the law can local governments hold the companies accountable.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, almost all major corporations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
their operation offshore for a number of reasons. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
players should fulfil to the highest level their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibilities
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
community where their headquarters or subsidiaries
are based
.

Firstly
, they should
actively
contribute to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
economy as a corporate taxpayer.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Local
tax authorities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
struggle navigating their financial matrix, partly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the complicated nature of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
whose capital flows in all directions. Another reason for this is that these deep-pocketed corporations may employ sophisticated instruments to evade
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
taxes.
Therefore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
economy would run a deficit if it fails to hold these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
accountable for tax paying responsibilities.

Secondly
, these global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
should be
fully
committed to environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibilities
. As a common practice, manufacturing is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
to developing or underdeveloped countries. The lax environmental law of the host country means that manufacturing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
takes a toll on the environment while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities
are crippled
by pollution.
For this reason
, it is vital that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
operate within the legal bounds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
environmental regulations.

Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
should
actively
contribute to the sustainable development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
workforce. Manufacturing, as a significant part of their offshore operation, is
usually
Possible spelling mistake found.
labour-intensive
;
however
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
does it brighten the future of its workers. As
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
the case, these employees
are trapped
in low-skilled assembly jobs and horrendous working conditions.
Therefore
, it is imperative that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
forces with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
authorities to build a
highly
skilled workforce for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
of the host country.

In conclusion
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
should seek to fulfil all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibilities
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
community.
Nevertheless
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by including
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibilities
in the law can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
hold the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
accountable.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay You saw an advertisement for a skiing course in Canada but you have one or two problems and can’t stay for the whole course. Write a letter to the course director. In your letter• explain your interest in the course• describe your problems• find ou v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
293 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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