Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Your local newspaper publish an advertisement asking people to help with environment projects in your areaWrite a letter to the project manager to offer your helpDescribe a local environmental issue that affects youExplain what would like to do to helpAnd v.1

Your local newspaper publish an advertisement asking people to help with environment projects in your areaWrite a letter to the project manager to offer your helpDescribe a local environmental issue that affects youExplain what would like to do to helpAnd v. 1
Some would argue that people who are addicted to drugs should go to jail because they have broken the law, while others say that they are sick and should be taken care of in hospital. While sentencing them to a term in prison is the quick and easy solution, I believe that it is better to be compassionate and help them get better in hospital. On the one hand, custodial sentences provide a short term solution to the drugs problem. By locking up addicts the government can take them off the street and they believe that this will stop them using narcotics and also causing any harm to others. For example, in the United States someone caught with even a small amount of heroine is likely to be locked up for a year. However, I believe that this is not solve the actual problem because drug addicts can gain access to drugs while in prison and will be hooked upon release. On the other hand, helping drug addicts kick their habit under medical supervision is thought to reduce the number of addicts in the long term. By treating addiction as a disease and the person with compassion, the root cause can be addressed and that person can eventually become free from drugs. For example, in Switzerland heroin addicts are given free heroin by doctors until they are ready to stop using the drug and this has resulted in drug related crime falling by 80%. I believe this method is preferable because addiction is a disease and it benefits both the individual and society as a whole. In conclusion, although throwing addicts in jail might get them off the street for a few years, it does not treat the actual problem and that is why it is more important to help them get off drugs in a medical facility. It is recommended that more governments follow this logic and bring in more forward thinking initiatives.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
would argue that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
are addicted
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
should go to jail
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have broken the law, while others say that they are sick and should
be taken
care of in hospital. While sentencing them to a term in prison is the quick and easy solution, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that it is better to be compassionate and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better in hospital.

On the one hand, custodial sentences provide a short term solution to the
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "drugs'" or "drug's"?
drugs
problem. By locking up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addicts
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can take them off the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
street and
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
them using narcotics and
also
causing any harm to others.
For example
, in the United States someone caught with even a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
amount of heroine is likely to
be locked
up for a year.
However
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that this is not
Consider using a past participle here: "solved".
solve
the actual problem
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addicts
can gain access to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
while in prison and will
be hooked
upon release.

On the other hand
, helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addicts
kick their habit under medical supervision is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addicts
in the long term. By treating addiction as a disease and the person with compassion, the root cause can
be addressed
and that person can
eventually
become free from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
.
For example
, in Switzerland heroin
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addicts
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
free heroin by doctors until they are ready to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
using the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
and this has resulted in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
related crime falling by 80%. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
this method is preferable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
addiction is a disease and it benefits both the individual and society as a whole.

In conclusion
, although throwing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addicts
in jail might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
them off the street for a few years, it does not treat the actual problem and
that is
why it is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
off
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
in a medical facility. It
is recommended
that more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
follow this logic and bring in more forward thinking initiatives.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
You live a new life for every new language you speak. If you know only one language, you live only once.
Czech Proverb

IELTS essay Your local newspaper publish an advertisement asking people to help with environment projects in your areaWrite a letter to the project manager to offer your helpDescribe a local environmental issue that affects youExplain what would like to do to helpAnd v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts